[Robo]

Dear songwriters,

Here is a list of words that rhyme with "friend" besides "end":

bend
mend
lend
send
tend
rend
trend
offend
pretend
defend
intend

I could append many more, but I think you get the picture. There are lots of words! There are entire books filled with nothing but words. Use your imagination!

Also, if any more of you tack "...my friend" onto the end of a line in a forced attempt to make it rhyme with one of the above words, I'm going to kick you in the balls. Nobody actually talks like this, my friend. And it sounds forced and unnatural and worse than no rhyme at all, which means it's simply not an acceptable break from normal speech, my friend.

Your friend,
Robo