Yeah thanks man, that did it. Oh, yeah I feel dumb.
I had done that and gotten nothing, but I just tried clicking up volume, down volume, then holding the power button down. Kept it down after those buttons I couldn't use showed up, and eventually it restarted. I wasn't holding down the power key and counting to 20 before, apparently.
Originally I had tried holding down a volume key plus the power key, and it fucking called 911.
All good! Yee haw.
BTW fuck new technology. I'm too old and distracted to be fixing this bullshit. LOL