I rest my case.
Ok. Seriously. Thank you for your help... so I understand correctly. I have to find out what the "CMOS Hot Key Sequence" is (probably Delete)? Is it basically one or two keys that I hold down when starting up (sort of like holding down the C key on a Mac to boot from a CD)? Or do I have to press combinations of things as it boots (God help me if "yes"). Is this key sequence basically the same for all machines from the same manufacturer, or is it based on your version of Windows?
Assuming I get to this CMOS thing, but have no Drive Autodetection under the list of options, how do I "manually plug the information in" exactly?
I swear, I don't know how people who use this system keep from ripping their hair out on a weekly basis. What a convoluted POS.