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kscherer
Which way is up?
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2019-11-26, 14:48

Quote:
Originally Posted by chucker View Post
The concrete depiction in the prequels wasn't great (for all kinds of reasons, like being unable to really empathize with any character), as has been litigated to death, but the basic plot outline isn't in question, is it?
I don't think so. I really think the premise was acceptable, but I believe that George was so hung up on the relationship between Anakin and Padme, and so adorably hopeless with the language of love, that he couldn't quite get it in order. Being surrounded by too many yes-men didn't help, since no one took a stand to challenge the hopelessly unbelievable premise that Anakin would slaughter hundreds or maybe thousands of children to "save Padme". No other explanation for the extermination of the Jedi was given, and Anakin's anguish throughout the movies was never believable enough to make me feel any sense of genuine discontent to the point of psychopathy. He was painted as an arrogant, hormonal, bumbling idiot surrounded by a sea of bumbling idiots. All the chatter of the greatness of the Jedi was painted over by bad CGI and poor dialogue surrounded by a story that wasn't "real" in any sense of the imagination.

Lucas wasn't wrong to show the weakenss of the Jedi (and perhaps arrogance), he was just wrong in his approach.

On that, I am going to repost a long thought I had back in 2014 that contains a brief script outline that I wrote in the lead-up to Episode 7. Lucas used the premise that "save Padme" was the reason for Anakin's turn to the dark side and his relentless hatred of the Jedi. It was never realistic, and I believed (and still do) that Anakin needed a better reason for his brutality and the conversion to Darth Vader. Here it is:



Before reading this very short script, please understand why I believe Episodes 1-3 are so completely and utterly unbelievable:

1) Anakin is considered "too old" to begin the training but begins the training anyway (Luke, almost twice as old, is also considered "too old" and also begins the training anyway). So, the Jedi don't bother following their own rules, like, EVER?

2) Anakin is "conceived by the midichlorians", something that then requires much explanation for the sake of what?

3) 10-year-old Anakin is infatuated with a young adult woman

4) A young adult woman is infatuated with 10-year-old Anakin



5) Anakin's mother is kidnapped and tortured by a horde of animal-people who are known for their brutish treatment of humans. Anakin is then demonized (not by the Jedi, but by the author) for punishing said horde, as "revenge goes against the Jedi code". Apparently, keeping order and peace in the galaxy is done by sheer wishful thinking.

6) Padmé's use of "I truly, deeply love you" is George Lucas' desperate fantasy coming forward as opposed to genuine dialogue between two people in love.

7) Padmé's pregnancy moves waaaaaay too fast

8) "I love you" then "no, I love you" is just stupid, childish dialogue, again pointing to the author's fantasies rather than good taste.

9) The best George could do to drive Anakin to the dark side is use Palpatine's past experience with hopefully, maybe, possibly using the force to save those we love from dying.

10) Flip the switch, kill the padawans and wipe out the Jedi because "save Padmé" is the lamest excuse for the transition from Anakin Skywalker to Darth Vader that Lucas could have possibly come up with. Only worse option would be "just because".



That said, Here is my idea of the 1-3 plot. No dialogue. I'm not going to rewrite the movies, just a glimpse into my head and how the story should have gone—from my perspective.

Episodes 1-3 gave us absolutely no reason to believe the sweet Anakin to evil Darth Vader transition. Instead, we were given some special effects, lovey-dovey, and corny humor on the way to a split second decision in which Anakin immediately became evil for save Padmé.

Just. Doesn't. Work.

Instead, we need events to take place that give Anakin a slow and progressively sinister hatred of the Jedi and their old, traditional ways. It cannot be a "snap" like Order 66 was for the clones. That is at least believable considering the Clones were manufactured. Anakin is a well-trained, highly talented Jedi and he wouldn't fail in a snap. He needs a good solid reason, or, as I outline, two of them.

Condensed Episode 1-3 plot for the sake of [at least some] believability:

Quote:
Episode 1

1) Opens with Trade Federation BS, only trade guys have CGI lips so they don't look like talking socks.

2) Jedi dialogue is less stupid

3) fight aboard trade fed ship. Jedi wind up on surface, where they encounter Jar Jar, who speaks to them in non-Jamaican english, and who is very intelligent and passive.

4) Jar Jar takes the Jedi to his council, where he is praised as an admirable, but solitary, Dungan. Jar Jar arranges for transportation to take the Jedi to the capitol city. In the capitol, the Jedi free the queen and take her and her personal staff to Coruscant, but get sidetracked along the way. Jar Jar is NOT along for the ride.

5) Some stuff about hyper drive failures and such leads them to Tatooine, where the queen's young Handmaiden, Padmé Amidala, is rescued from drunken sailors by the also young Anakin Skywalker. Anakin is a teenager of 18. Padmé is 17.

6) Anakin had a real dad who was killed by the Huts for cheating and refusing to pay a gambling debt. Thus, Anakin and his mother were taken into slavery to pay the debt, then sold to that flying insect dude.

7) Anakin can save the day and Pod Races and such (the original bit works, so mostly leave it alone).

8) Qui Gon Jin recognizes the Force in Anakin through his skillful pod racing. Offers him option to train as Jedi, must leave mommy (taking small children from their mommy for save-the-galaxy-training is lame). Qui Gon is able to free both him AND his mother, but only Anakin can go along for the ride.

9) Some special effects and blowing stuff up. Jedi return to Naboo for some fighting and stuff. Qui Gon dies. Obi Wan goes all ballistic and genuinely kicks Darth Maul's ass! There is no "hanging from the high place and then jumping in the air, grabbing a light saber and cutting dude in half. No F'in way. Obi Wan straight up kicks Maul's ass and dices him in pieces!

10) The Jedi Council sees a dark future for Anakin and requests he not be trained. In arrogance, Obi Wan Kenobi defies the council and takes Anakin for his padawan.

Episode 2

1) The Jedi are confronted with a new evil. A group of star systems have announced their secession from the Republic and chaos is coming.

2) Amidst the chaos it is learned that Anakin's mother has been taken hostage (or other such thing) in Palpatine's secret effort to destabilize the Hutt's stranglehold on gambling. Battle Droids have taken the planet and control Mos Eisley.

3) The Jedi Council issues Jedi Knight Obi Wan Kenobi and his padawan Anakin Skywalker (Skywalker for his familiarity with the planet) to seek a diplomatic release of hostages. The separatists refuse, and a battle erupts.

3) Needing reinforcements, the outnumbered Jedi call for assistance, which padawan Skywalker sees as a weakness.

4) The separatist invaders decry Jedi involvement as an affront to their sovereign rights and declare war on the Republic. This declaration is lead by Geonosis (the droid foundry world) and some other planets with neat creatures and stuff.

5) The Jedi make bad tactical decisions which lead to the deaths of ALL the hostages, including Anakin's mother.

6) Upon return to Coruscant, Anakin is reunited with Padmé and confides in her his deep sorrow over his mother, emotions he is not permitted to share with his Jedi brethren. Anakin realizes the Jedi's mistakes lead to his mother's death.

7) More confrontation, this time on Geonosis. Anakin must leave immediately. Padmé stows away in the ship. Obi Wan and Anakin are dispatched to look into allegations that Geonosis is behind the droid armies. They are all captured. R2-D2 learns he does NOT have jet-feet, and C-3P0 isn't terribly funny.

8) There is some pomp and theater and some shooting and light sabers and such before Yoda saves the day with his fleet of clones and such.

9) Episode 2 closes with Anakin and Padmé in mourning, and also learning of her pregnancy. Padmé is not sweet and innocent. She convinces Anakin the Jedi are entirely at fault for his mother's death.

10) Final scene has Palpatine and folks watching the Star Destroyer fleet leave the planet.

Episode 3

1) Padmé Amidala has become a powerful leader in the Republic

2) Jedi Knight Anakin Skywalker leads various missions against the growing separatists, who are fighting against the oppression caused by Palpatine's governance

3) Chancellor Palpatine shows Anakin the "evil" ways of the Jedi and their past failings, including a "secret memo" instructing Obi Wan Kenobi to destroy the hostages since this would give power to the separatists. Palpatine convinces Anakin the Jedi are stirring up the war to overthrow the Senate. Anakin confronts Obi Wan over these allegations, leading to a minor scuffle. Obi Wan realizes something is very wrong.

4) The separatists kidnap a very pregnant Padmé and carry her to Mustafar

5) Chancellor Palpatine sends a giant fleet of Star Destroyers and clones to Mustafar to challenge the separatist fleet hiding there

6) General Obi Wan Kenobi leads a small army of Jedi while behind the scenes, Palpatine orchestrates tactics that ensure defeat for the Jedi, whose decisions lead to severe injury for Padmé.

7) Once again, Obi Wan Kenobi is leading the fight when the disaster happens. However, he realizes that some other power is at play and tries to save Padmé. She enters premature delivery and the twins, Luke and Leia, are born. Soon after, she dies of her injuries.

8) Before Anakin sees his children (Obi Wan is now aware he is the father) Obi wan approaches him to inform him of her death and the presence of dark forces. Anakin is already convinced the Jedi are behind her death and lashes out in a rage.

9) Fight stuff on Mustafar. Anakin's powerful, dark side comes raging forward and he is clearly beating his master until Obi Wan gains the upper hand (high ground). Obi Wan slices and dices Anakin and leaves him for dead.

10) Palpatine shows up on Mustafar to collect Anakin and rebuilds the 6-million dollar man. Anakin does not go all Frankenstein on us, but immediately recognizes the superior nature of his mechanical limbs and demands revenge on the Jedi. Palpatine demands his allegiance as a Syth apprentice and knights him Darth Vader

11) Palpatine draws on his secretly planned order 66, which places the Clones' inhuman loyalty under the direct authority of their new general, Darth Vader. Darth Vader makes his move on the Jedi Temple as the Jedi are scattered and overcome by the growing war. He orders the clones to kill all in the temple—man, woman, and child.

12) Darth Vader's anger leads him to slaughter one Jedi after another before ordering the temple burnt to the ground.

13) Darth Vader meets Master's Kit Fisto and Mace Windu coming to save the temple. He proclaims them a disease that must be eradicated. The greatest light saber battle in history erupts. Darth Vader overcomes the Jedi with superior use of the force in every way. As Windu lays dying, he "informs" Vader that the Jedi will not allow this tragedy to stand. "The Jedi are spineless murderers," Vader says in his deep, James Earl Jones. "They murdered my mother and they murdered my wife. I will hunt every last Jedi until they are extinct!" Then he dices Windu's head.

14) Meanwhile, Yoda encounters Palpatine

15) Palpatine reveals the Dark Jedi, a group of "reformed" Jedi who he sends out to destroy the Jedi stationed in the far reaches of the galaxy (prelude to episodes 7-9)

16) Obi Wan takes the twins and off we go to Episode 4


If something like this were the backstory, and someone who loved Star wars—and understood the story—were writing the final 3 chapters (Episodes 7-9) things would look very different for all of us.

And Episodes 7-9 would be all about the Jedi Master Luke Skywalker and his training of new Jedi to counter the growing threat from the Dark Jedi.

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Last edited by kscherer : 2019-11-26 at 15:32.
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