[psmith2.0]

When, exactly, did the Travel Channel transition from the glorious, life-affirming source of Samantha-Brown-in-her-bikini (and strappy footwear) programming it was always meant to be, to Ghost & Paranormal Dipshit Central?

“I done seen Bigfoot blowin’ a leprechaun last night during a Satanic UFO ritual in that field over yonder! But my phone only records in upside-down, full-blur 8ppi mode, so, naturally, I ain’t got no good clear, definitive footage. Y'all maybe wanna make a 90-minute show about it? I swaaarrrre I seen it…most scariest shit I’d ever saw!"



I’m sure it was, Cletus.




There’s an entire network devoted to this.




They probably win awards.

[kscherer]

Chewbacca. It was Chewbacca and R2.

Nothing to see here.

[709]

I'm guessing about the same time the Discovery Channel started airing 'Naked and Afraid'. As if I didn't get my pixelized limp dick and flat ass fill from the last 95 seasons of Survivor [your flavor here].

[psmith2.0]

So weird.

These once-respectable channels - Travel, Discovery, TLC, Animal Planet, etc. - have all become “reality” outlets. Child pageant competitors (I take it being somewhat attractive/talented is no longer a requirement?), house flippers who’ve never held a hammer, people panning for gold, tuna fishermen, county lockup inmates/guards, pawnshop owners, turtle whisperers, car repo crews, moonshiners, exterminators, alligator hunters, dog catchers, hoarders, bartenders, addicts/intervention candidates, bikers, families whose wife/mom has a clown car for a vagina, etc.

Basically any occupation or lifestyle that doesn’t warrant a TV series built around it is pretty much guaranteed one on these networks.

“You make kites from dried panda ball sacks? We’d like to sign you to a four-year deal!” - Every Executive from TLC

Cable is like the Internet (and vice versa)...all the great, useful things it could be takes a backseat to everyone getting to hear one of those Kardashian jizz flasks tell us how she organically steams her cooter to help center her chakra/reach her full potential.

[kscherer]

Oh, Paul, you kill me!

Originally Posted by pscates2.0 … turtle whisperers …

Are you gonna stand for that, Tony?

[psmith2.0]

I skimmed by some “hoarder” show and nearly threw up and genuinely got angry.

When you’re having to climb over 3-4 feet of 30-year-old newspapers to make a Pop-Tart and you’re shitting in a 5-gallon bucket in your living room because you can no longer get inside your bathroom...you’ve made a wrong turn somewhere. You don’t need to be on TV, FFS...you need to be getting help. Real help, mind you...not the Dr. Phil hey-everybody-look-how-messed-up-today’s-guest-is horseshit. That demonic bald-headed, rat-eyed son-of-a-bitch needs to be beaten with a board, but that’s probably another thread.

Don’t put these mental cases on TV for point-and-laugh/trainwreck fare. That’s cruel and disgusting and doesn’t serve one legit, genuine purpose.

That kind of programming actually pisses me off.

[chucker]

Originally Posted by pscates2.0 When, exactly, did the Travel Channel transition from the glorious, life-affirming source of Samantha-Brown-in-her-bikini (and strappy footwear) programming it was always meant to be, to Ghost & Paranormal Dipshit Central?

In 2018, I guess. That's when Discovery purchased Travel Channel back and rebranded it as Trvl (2005 is calling; Flickr is threatening a lawsuit).

And guess who's at the helm of Discovery? David Zaslav, who grew market cap about threefold. How did he do that? He "has spearheaded strategic efforts to clarify and strengthen Discovery's brands". Ah, I see. So the Discovery Channel is now more about discovery, the Travel Channel is more about travel, and… <record scratch> no no.

Here's how he "clarified" those brands: "he has expanded the company's genres from nonfiction to nonfiction, lifestyle, sports and kids."

Sigh.

[chucker]

Originally Posted by pscates2.0 the Dr. Phil hey-everybody-look-how-messed-up-today’s-guest-is horseshit. That demonic bald-headed, rat-eyed son-of-a-bitch needs to be beaten with a board, but that’s probably another thread.

Relevant:

https://twitter.com/Acyn/status/1250975504401760256

Dr. Phil appears on Laura Ingraham and says we don’t shut the country down for automobile deaths, cigarette related deaths, and swimming pool deaths

(Is he willfully ignoring what the word "contagious" means? Who knows. Who cares.

As someone said, if Oprah really wants to do some good, she needs to disavow this person.)

[psmith2.0]

He’s a ghoul and a moron, always has been. And that Oprah laid him on is doesn’t speak well about her dumb ass either.

[PB PM]

Most cable TV is no worse than the most popular YouTube channels, but still best avoided at all costs. At least one YouTube you can find good content if you try, cable TV, not so much.

[psmith2.0]

YouTube is great. I don’t watch/follow the moron attention whores, crybabies and drama queens, but there are great DIY, woodworking, carpentry, music, guitar, “how things work”, etc. clips and channels.

I learn more from YouTube in 12 months than I do TV in 12 years (because even once-favorite channels like HGTV and DIY have all gone the ginned-up “drama” and/or competition reality route.

Teach me how to build a deck...don’t make four drama-queen or bro-dude dumbasses “compete” in some multi-part series to see who can build the most “extreme” one. None of that stupid stuff serves a purpose or teaches anything. It’s just jackwits and dickheads wearing tool belts and acting the way reality show participants act.

I hate that these once smart, helpful and informative networks have all embraced the HoneyBooBoo/Who Wants To Marry a Felon?/Pawn Shop Assholes on Parade racket.

What an absolute waste of resources, talent, infrastructure, etc.

[murbot]

Originally Posted by pscates2.0 When you’re having to climb over 3-4 feet of 30-year-old newspapers to make a Pop-Tart and you’re shitting in a 5-gallon bucket in your living room because you can no longer get inside your bathroom...you’ve made a wrong turn somewhere.

This is gold.

[psmith2.0]

Sad thing is, that's not something I conjured up for effect...there was an episode where a woman was using a 5-gallon bucket as her toilet. I bailed before things got into too much detail. The fact that they showed the bucket but blurred around the top of it was my "okay, I'm done here" portion of the program. Apparently the lady wasn't Annie Oakley in the aiming department...

[psmith2.0]

BTW, in case I wasn't clear enough in my opening post, here are all the shows of the ghost/paranormal variety slated for the coming week (today, Sunday April 19 through next Saturday at midnight):

- True Terror with Robert England
- Paranormal Caught on Camera (the blurriest, shakiest and most pixelated ones in existence, apparently)
- My Haunted House
- Ghosts of Morgan City
- Ghost Adventures (douche-bro Zak Bagans and his Warby Parkers, tough-talking ghosts..."yo, come at me, Casper!")
- Ghost Nation
- Paranormal 911 (cops, EMTs, etc. having ghostly/paranormal encounters on the job...crackheads not scary enough?)
- Haunted Hospitals
- The Dead Files
- My Ghost Story
- Destination Fear
- Ghost Loop
- Hometown Horror
- My Paranormal Nightmare

Those are all just coming on this week, with many (most?) of them on a back-to-back schedule, with multiple episodes (3-10 hours straight) airing one after the other in "binge" format, easily making up the bulk of the channel's airtime.

When you check Travel Channel's (or Trvl, I guess?) website, you get these others which I guess come on at random times throughout the month as well:

- Haunting in the Heartland
- Kindred Spirits
- Portals to Hell (hosted by Ozzy Osbourne's son, for some reason)
- A Haunting
- Amish Haunting ("we awoketh the next morning to find that the barn had somehow built itself!")
- Demon House
- Ghost Asylum
- Ghost Bait
- Haunted Towns
- Helltown
- Haunted Things (this is the catch-all show for anything not covered by all the others...thimbles, magic markers, etc.)
- Most Terrifying Places (Me? The grocery checkout lane, behind a 60-something woman with expired coupons and no ink in any of the 11 pens in her purse)
- My Horror Story
- Paranormal Emergency
- Paranormal Survivor
- These Woods Are Haunted
- When Ghosts Attack



I don't even know if the lovely Ms. Brown even appears on the channel anymore. If so, probably as the host of "Haunted Hotels with Samantha Brown" or "The World's Most Haunted Beach Resorts". And I'd be okay with this, provided she's sporting the aforementioned bikini and/or strappy footwear.

Mind you, I focused primarily on the ghost/haunting programming above. I never even delved into the various UFO/Area 51, Bigfoot/Loch Ness, "strange places", Psychics & Mystical Shit™, etc. shows the network also likes to air.

So when I ask in my opening thread "when did this channel transition to all ghosts/paranormal fare?", I wasn't exaggerating or only asking because I'd stumbled across 3-4 shows. It's the entire network, and the bulk of their weekly programming!

On top of all that, I'm really not sure what any of it has to do with "travel".

Just cut the crap and call it Ghost Channel...sorry, GhstTV

[Ryan]

If you want a *good* paranormal (but fictional) show, Wellington Paranormal is fantastic. It's a spinoff of What We Do In The Shadows based around the two cops who show up at the vampires' house. The original Kiwi movie, not the US show.

Basically it's a spoof of Cops with two Wellington police officers tracking paranormal activity around Wellington, led by an absolute clown of a lieutenant. Absolute deadpan delivery even when they encounter fire-breathing zombies or whatever. Just watch this scene from the pilot:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KYEqWaHMjDU