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Mr. Vieira
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Tennessee
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I seem to recall you having a run-in or two with some thug types over the years. So it's bad enough that you've gotten into scrapes with others, but now you're kicking your own ass too? You can't catch a break, huh? You need a vacation. |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: london and københavn
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Yeah, I KICKED MY ASS.
Actually I must admit I'm slightly exaggerating. I did punch myself in the face, that's true, but the mark is very small. I'm more annoyed with myself for the fact I did it all, frankly. gibberish |
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Rocket Surgeon
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: The Canadark
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Subdued and Medicated
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Dear Beltley driver;
Yeah that bump as we both backed into each other in the parking lot really sucked. Thank you for being calm and civil like myself. You do have a nice car and you seem like an intelligent and successful person. There is a big difference in income when you compare your "new $200,000" car against my $14,000 Honda. But I have a question... Why the heck do you not have proof of insurance in your $200,000 car? Seriously? Also, why would you let your registration expire months ago? You are obviously smarter then that. These are things required by California law for the privilege of driving on our roads. Is there a scam going on I can't comprehend? To me it looks like it's only biting you in the ass. Sincerely, -Confused |
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Hoonigan
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Canada
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Dear Calves and Feet,
Sorry about that 3 1/2 hour walk on Saturday morning. I just started, got into that podcast, and time flew. Yeah, you're getting a little more work while I'm wearing the Vibram Five Fingers, but you'll thank me eventually. Hey feet, at least I gave you some fresh air for about half an hour while I ran through that one park barefoot. That was cool. Anyway, if you could quit reminding me about the damn walk every time I step, that would be great. It's not like I haven't fed you several Advil caps. Put a fucking lid on it, we'll do it a few more times, then you can put on your big boy pants and quit crying, ok? Lovingly, The guy who will stomp you on nails if you don't shut up |
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Ice Arrow Sniper
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Hates the Infotainment
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
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LMAO. |
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Formerly Roboman, still
awesome Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Portland, OR
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Dear Scribner,
I thoroughly enjoyed your new Tenth Anniversary Edition of Stephen King's On Writing, as I should, as I've purchased the book twice now. Still, it was worth it to replace my well-worn mass market edition with an elegant trade paperback. But there's a problem. The text starts on page 17. This, in and of itself, isn't a big deal — it's non-traditional to include the front matter (pages labeled with little roman numerals) in your page count when you reach the body text, but it's not unheard of. I do the exact same thing in one of my novels, right down to starting at page 17 (which is important!). The problem is, there's only twelve pages of front matter. You skip from page xii to 17. I bet I can tell you exactly what happened. It's obvious: You shortened the front matter and forgot to adjust the pagination (which is a pity, because I think Stephen would have rather liked to see his memoir start on page 13). It's painfully obvious that you shortened the front matter because you begin the first and third forewords on the verso (left page). This is awkward and inelegant. Proper page breaks would add a page before and after each...the missing four pages. It's equally obvious where those pages went: as there's no errors in pagination throughout the body text (I'll at least give you that much), the seemingly last-minute adjustment at the beginning must be to account for an addition of material at the end, and sure enough, the new-for-this-edition extension to Stephen King's reading list is exactly four pages, bringing the "page count" to a bizarre 292.* I'm not complaining (getting dozens more book recommendations instead of four blank pages is hardly a raw deal), but fix your damn pagination next time. You think no one notices. You think there will be no one to stop you. You're probably right, but I'm that no one, I'm the crazy pagination maven who's supposed to keep you honest, like the people who call Dove with questions about soap in The Tipping Point. And, speaking of The Tipping Point: Back Bay Books, page 255 of the trade paperback edition contains the wrong page header. Love and good times, Robo *) Some of you might be wondering, why did adding these four pages necessitate removing pages from the front matter? Books are printed many pages at a time, usually 16 or 32. This is why some books have blank pages at the end, and why if you count all the pages in a book (making sure to count the front matter if it's not included in the page count) you'll count to the same numbers again and again, like 256, 272, and 288, which is how many pages On Writing really has. and i guess i've known it all along / the truth is, you have to be soft to be strong |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Mel-Bun!
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Dear Dr. Sherley (one of the plaintiffs who was successful in getting the courts to impose an injunction on federally-funded embryonic stem cell research)
You argued for the ban of federal funding of ESC research on the grounds that it makes it harder for you to compete for grant money to support your own research with adult stem cells. OK, fine. But the fact that you received nearly half a million dollars in federal funding for your research kind of makes that argument a little weak. Coupled with the fact that almost twice as much NIH grant money goes to ASC research compared to ESC research, you don't seem to have much of a case. A quick Google search on your name shows that you are an outspoken opponent of ESC research (and abortion) because you believe it involves the destruction of innocent human lives. Based on that little tidbit I need to ask you: Are you sure your motives for opposing funding ESC research are really due to the "competition for grants" thing and not based on moral grounds? Because it appears that you're not telling the whole truth here. In any case, thanks to you, hundreds of people stand to lose their jobs because researchers can no longer afford to pay them once their federal funding dries up, amongst many other problems. Thanks, dude. Seriously. PS I really want to say more but don't want to get in any libel trouble...I might already be skirting it here. I'm just PO'd to the max. Specialists are people who know more and more about less and less until they know everything about nothing. Generalists are people who know less and less about more and more until they know nothing about everything. I'm somewhere in the middle. |
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Wait what
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: El Dorado County, California
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Since we're in the habit of writing letters to ourselves 'round here, I've got one of my own.
Dear Brain, Seeing as you are responsible for everything I know and do on a daily basis, it came as somewhat of a surprise to me that you seem to have confused yourself for some kind of bird (or dinosaur). How did I come to this conclusion, you may ask? Well, it seems that you've been making admirable efforts over the last hour or so to pound your way out of my head. Let me assure you that my skull is not, in fact, an unusually-reinforced eggshell, nor are you some kind of avian longing to feel the air rushing beneath your wings. You are a blobby, greyish cluster of neurons and synapses, and even were you to find yourself free of the confines of my head, you wouldn't make it very far on account of being physically tethered to my spine. Not to mention a glaring lack of wings (or appendages of any kind, really). Plus, it really kinda hurts. In short, knock it off. Respectfully, me. (Off to take some Tylenol and get some sleep...) |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Mel-Bun!
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To Public Transport Users in Melbourne:
Most of you are well-behaved and respectable users of the system who do the right thing. And I thank you for that. For the rest of you, I have a few things I need to get off my chest: 1) Trains and trams are not pubs or bars. Enough with drinking alcohol on public transport. It's not really pleasant to be stuck next to someone who reeks of booze and is drinking a huge bottle of malt liquor at 7 in the morning. 2) Smoking on public transport went out ages ago. To all of you who think you're entitled to smoke on the tram because you don't want to waste a cigarette you just lit: Fuck you, you're a self-absorbed asshole. 3) People wearing backpacks: Take the fucking things off and hold them in your hands. It's not fun to have to squeeze through an aisle when you and your fucking backpacks are taking up 7/8ths of the available aisle. 4) For God's sake, take a shower occasionally!! Public transportation in Melbourne is already a pain in the ass without you assholes making it worse with your selfish and asshole-ish behaviour. Much love Disgruntled public transport user. Specialists are people who know more and more about less and less until they know everything about nothing. Generalists are people who know less and less about more and more until they know nothing about everything. I'm somewhere in the middle. |
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9" monochrome
Join Date: May 2004
Location: 🇦🇺
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ditto
Also, to that gentleman (and I use the term loosely) on the packed morning train to the city (Glen Waverley line) who insists on putting his feet on the opposite seat so he can rest his laptop on his knees, preventing others from sitting down... you're an inconsiderate pig. Actually, I've had it. Next time I see you, I'm going to attempt to sit on your feet so you get the hint. |
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Ice Arrow Sniper
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Dear internal clock,
Please, can we stop this madness? We had it set - we were going to bed at 11. That became midnight, then 2, then 4, and now it's 5 AM. This isn't healthy. For anyone. Can we please stop responding to everything with insomnia? Authentic Nova Scotia bagpipe innards |
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Nov 2006
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Dear person who stood in front of the condiments & napkins while slowly typing out a text message,
0/10. sincerely, me |
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Mr. Vieira
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Tennessee
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Dear Authors, TV Networks and Movie Studios -
Knock it off already with all the vampire shit. It's getting a little ridiculous. - Paul PS - Not everything has to be in 3D either. |
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Formerly Roboman, still
awesome Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Portland, OR
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I give Scholastic major props for releasing their biggest book of the year — Suzanne Collins' Mockingjay — with a pleasant sky blue cover. There's a series that could easily do the grimdark cover thing (it's dystopian sci-fi) but doesn't. It looks like nothing else on the shelf, which is kinda sad, but good for them. and i guess i've known it all along / the truth is, you have to be soft to be strong |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Mel-Bun!
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Which reminds me: To the lovely people waiting for the #59 Tram heading to the city in the morning: I know you have places to go and appointments to keep and clocks to punch in. So do I. But if the tram pulls up to your stop and it is packed to the point where people are hanging out the door, please please please pretty pretty please don't insist on trying to jam yourself in. Take a look down the road. I guarantee you that there will be another tram right behind. Better yet, download the free Tram Tracker application. Use it to see how far behind the next tram is. I guarantee you it'll be 2 minutes maximum. And will be far less crowded. If you can't wait 2 whole minutes for a relatively empty tram then perhaps you should consider re-structuring your morning a little. Your insistence on trying to cram yourself into an already packed tram only causes delays. Ultimately the tram driver will be so far behind schedule that he will invariably kick everybody out of the tram on Lonsdale St. so he can head up the other way and try to get back on schedule. And you don't get to your destination any quicker because you either have to walk further or patiently wait to get on the tram right behind to finish your journey. Use some common sense, please. It will make everybody's day so much better. Including yours. Thanks so much Drewby Specialists are people who know more and more about less and less until they know everything about nothing. Generalists are people who know less and less about more and more until they know nothing about everything. I'm somewhere in the middle. |
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Veteran Member
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: State of Flux
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Dear Next Life,
Like this more: http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/galle...68274&index=23 Thanks for considering! See you down the road, AWR |
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Mr. Vieira
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Tennessee
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Off-topic (click to toggle):
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Mr. Vieira
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Tennessee
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Dear AppleNova "Letters" Thread,
You were doing so good! Oh well...It was fun while it lasted. - Paul |
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Mel-Bun!
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Didn't realize there was a ban on all things politics.
Post has been deleted with apologies... |
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Mr. Vieira
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Tennessee
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It's not worth missing the point. I considered using "well", but the other sounded more gooder.
No "ban" (and I don't have any pull or say-so around here...don't delete stuff over me or any goofy thing I say). I simply responded to your Keith Olbermann routine. You could've told me to "piss off" and kept it. You weren't breaking any "rules". |
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M AH - ch ain saw
Join Date: May 2004
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Why rock the boat tho? I can see where he's coming from in deleting the comment, not knowing how people would react in advance.
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Formerly Roboman, still
awesome Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Portland, OR
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Dear companies,
It's 2010. Stop treating people who try to get support via email like second-class citizens. By that I mean, when I email you something, don't "resolve" the issue by telling me to just call into your customer service and tell them the exact same thing I just emailed you, because they're the *real* customer service department. Email isn't new. Sprint was especially bad about this. Why even have an email/chat support department if all they do is tell you to freaking call? I'm sick of digging around for the email link, sending a carefully worded email (carefully categorized to go to the correct scriptbots), and waiting almost all of the allotted response time (of course!) only to get an email back saying "call us!" I mean geez, next time just tell me in advance your email department is useless. I just hate talking to strangers on the phone, OK? I wouldn't hate it so much if you weren't all morons, but hey. Also, Chase, you suck. Not only did you do the whole useless email "support" thing, but your useless response also said that you tried to contact me when you shut off my card due to "suspicious activity." But you didn't. Hell, you didn't even leave me a message in my little Chase Online Message Center thing. I mean, geez, one would think "oh, by the way, we shut off your card" would be the type of message that center was made for. You'd think that's where they'd leave a message containing that information. You know. Just as an aside. A postscript. A little p.s. -Robo and i guess i've known it all along / the truth is, you have to be soft to be strong |
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Veteran Member
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Promise Land of Trustafarians
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Mel-Bun!
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Dear Pastor Terry Jones
Please don't burn the Koran, k? Not cool. thx S. |
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