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http://duggmirror.com/apple/The_iPho...face/?u=iphone

This is absolutely hysterical and completely spot on in my opinion.

Though I do not like Maddux because he sold out for good to right his book (the alphabet of manliness or something like that), I do tend to agree with him on just about everything he writes on the website.

It also seems he switched from using MS Paint for his images, as they are now animated. Weak sauce. However, the use of lim as x approaches infinity of sin(x)/x was pretty clever.

edit: for robo and banana

[Luca]

Maddox still updates his site?

I had no idea. His stuff used to be funny but over the last three years, they got kind of tired and repetitive, and he updated less and less frequently. I stopped checking his site over a year ago.

[Robo]

First of all: Maddox.

Second of all: There's a difference between being technically able to play MP3s and being an iPod. Most phones can play MP3s, but few people consider them iPod replacements. It's like saying that you'll never need a digital camera because you have a shitty VGA camera on your phone.

Third of all: I'm sick of the "OMG my phone has UNLIMITED storage, because I can keep on buying little tiny cards!" argument. How many people honestly keep four 2GB microSD cards with themselves at all times? 8GB of storage is pretty much unheard of for a phone (Nokia N91 aside) so I don't think anyone is going to really sweat not being able to carry little tiny cards any more.

That said, it's Maddox. Since when was he suppose to be taken seriously?

[Partial]

Maddox is the man. I no longer check his site either, Luca. He sold out and is now a millionaire from his book sales and whatnot. His stuff is still hilarious and very spot on, though. The other post about how Apple users cannot shut the fuck up defines about half the pretentious hipster "mac community".

iPod replacement, robo? give me a break. You're buying into the exact marketing that Apple wants you to.

The iPhone is one of the shittiest mp3 player on the market. Try using it to workout or run or do other real-life activities with it and you'll see the limitations.

It takes all the good things about the iPod (scroll wheel, one click song change, etc) and ruins them. It is the anti-iPod. I hope to god they don't replace the current gen of iPods with a piece of garbage like the iPhone's version of the iPod.

[Robo]

You're totally right, tensdanny. Your way of seeing things is the only correct one. My viewpoint will never be valid because I am a naive college student who spends all my money on Apple gear because I can't help but fall for their marketing and hype.

[Koodari]

When he's ranting about the interface, that's Maddox doing what Maddox does best. Obviously both iPhone's interface and the physical keyboard have their upsides. And the physical keyboard's upside is typing lots of text. If a small virtual keyboard were to approach a small (thumb-operated) keyboard's speed, I think it would have to use tricks way more radical than iPhone does. Maybe some kind of chording, or typing in syllables instead of simple word completion. Which, btw, doesn't fare well with languages like Finnish that have a huge amount of context-determining suffixes for any word.

But Maddox isn't shooting blanks towards the end. 3G, voice/call recording, video recording, video calls, exchangeable battery (in the course of the lifetime of a phone this adds very real expense and hassle), open software development, native instant messaging and copy-paste are genuinely missing from iPhone.
Apart from causing moistness in Scarlett Johansson by rebooting a web server via SSH, he doesn't even talk about the capabilities stemming from addon software, such as the option to use the phone as GPS by attaching a cheapo GPS module via Bluetooth and downloading map software.
The storage thing is once again normal Maddox hyperbole, but then, how much storage do you need on a device like that? I'd be fine with 2GB, and 4GB micro SD will likely come out at some point. I don't like the idea of swapping the cards, but if it suits you, the cards are small enough to keep multiples in your wallet. Nintendo DS and other handheld owners don't seem to have a problem managing much larger cartridges.

The big thing is iPhone's price vs the E70's price. The E70 here is 420€ with no strings attached, or 0€ initial outlay + 30€ a month with unlimited 3G data on a two year contract. I think at this price difference the iPhone needs to match more features.

[InactionMan]

That was remarkably unfunny.

[Banana]

Originally Posted by InactionMan That was remarkably unfunny.

++.

[Kickaha]

Originally Posted by Luca Maddox still updates his site? I had no idea. His stuff used to be funny but over the last three years, they got kind of tired and repetitive, and he updated less and less frequently. I stopped checking his site over a year ago.

People still read him? I think his stuff was funny, oh, maybe when he started, but after about round 5 of his ego masturbation, he got old. And he says others are pretentious. Uh huh.

Koodari - given that the life of the battery is measured in years, how often do you buy a new phone? Around 400 full charge cycles to drop to 80% capacity. Okay, figure you completely drain it and recharge it every single frickin' day - you're looking at about 13 months later, it being at 80%. Figure another year before you upgrade (2yr contract, remember?) and it's down to, oh 50%. That's with a full drain and recharge *every day*. Maybe that's your use pattern, I don't know, but I do know that I recharge my phone about 1-2x a week. At that rate, it'll be around 6 years, average, before it even drops to 80% capacity.

[Wyatt]

Originally Posted by Kickaha People still read him? I think his stuff was funny, oh, maybe when he started, but after about round 5 of his ego masturbation, he got old. And he says others are pretentious. Uh huh.

I agree. Fake Steve is the new Maddox for me. It's a completely different approach from what Maddox does, and I find it much more relevant and entertaining.

The lunatic act was funny early on (and going back to read his old stuff is still fun), but the last couple years have been lame.

[Eugene]

I thought it was hilarious, especially the visual reinforcement.

The Perl script was pro.

[BuonRotto]

Strikes me as another CmdrTaco feature-itis assessment a la the original iPod:

"No wireless. Less space than a nomad. Lame."

And I suspect the crow will taste the same.

[Kickaha]

Yeah, but the point isn't crow, the point is fame. Look at how you knew Taco's name...

OTOH, when you have a bunch of self-styled rebels all plowing the same row, it kind of reminds me of a scene from Life of Brian: "We are all individuals!" "I'm not!" "SHUT UP!" Somehow, in an effort to be a bleeding-edge individual, Maddox, Dvorak, and all the rest of these walking egos, end up looking oddly the same. Doesn't matter though, as long as you know who they are, right?

"OMG, nobody reads my site any more, what will I *do*! I know! I'll pick on the <insert wildly popular product here>! That'll get the masses talking about me again! (And get me more filthy lucre from site hits...)"

[Banana]

Wait, wait, wait... You're telling me that Maddox isn't Dvoark? Not even 'Dvoark is Maddox'? Wow, geez, I wish someone would have told me that!

[BuonRotto]

True dat. You can also include all the post-Lenny Bruce comedians who are supposedly "pushing the envelope" by going out of their way to say things that would offend -- although their efforts are so transparent, it's only pathetic. I got over the angry-young-man act when I was about 22. Some people live their whole life like that... or at least act like it. And I guess a lot of other people do too considering how popular that schtick still is. To me, this is Maddox's whole bit, and it's more than tired.

[torifile]

Originally Posted by tensdanny38 Maddox is the man. I no longer check his site either, Luca. He sold out and is now a millionaire from his book sales and whatnot. His stuff is still hilarious and very spot on, though. The other post about how Apple users cannot shut the fuck up defines about half the pretentious hipster "mac community". iPod replacement, robo? give me a break. You're buying into the exact marketing that Apple wants you to. The iPhone is one of the shittiest mp3 player on the market. Try using it to workout or run or do other real-life activities with it and you'll see the limitations. It takes all the good things about the iPod (scroll wheel, one click song change, etc) and ruins them. It is the anti-iPod. I hope to god they don't replace the current gen of iPods with a piece of garbage like the iPhone's version of the iPod.

You're smoking something if you really think that the iPhone is a shitty music player. (And if you think Maddox is good writing or innovative in any way, you're not exactly a good judge of taste anyway.) It's fantastic. There are a few drawbacks to the interface changes but the listening experience is much more enhanced with the tactility of the interface. I love the way they've done the metaphorically "flipping" the CD to see what's on it and pick what you want to listen to.

It's such a gratifying experience to browse through albums, all arranged alphabetically (the way I wish my real CD collection would be!) with album art so you can see what you're looking for.

"Real world" usage? What do you do in the real world that makes selecting an album and putting the thing in your pocket difficult? The fact that you can adjust the volume or pause the playback without having to turn "hold" off are great usability enhancements. I don't know about you, but I walk far more than I run and there are still iPods out there, you know.

I'm not going to get into debunking the shit you spewed about one touch song changes and whatnot but I'll only say you're wrong. I wonder if you're response is some sort of visceral one you've got whenever Roboman posts something. Get over it.

[datapusher]

Originally Posted by tensdanny38 Maddox is the man. I no longer check his site either, Luca. He sold out and is now a millionaire from his book sales and whatnot. His stuff is still hilarious and very spot on, though. The other post about how Apple users cannot shut the fuck up defines about half the pretentious hipster "mac community". iPod replacement, robo? give me a break. You're buying into the exact marketing that Apple wants you to. The iPhone is one of the shittiest mp3 player on the market. Try using it to workout or run or do other real-life activities with it and you'll see the limitations. It takes all the good things about the iPod (scroll wheel, one click song change, etc) and ruins them. It is the anti-iPod. I hope to god they don't replace the current gen of iPods with a piece of garbage like the iPhone's version of the iPod.

I hope you're not running with a hard drive based iPod. If you are, then you're just about as dim as the rest of your post.

I think your trashing of the iPhone's iPod function shows you know nothing about it besides what you've seen on television/heard from your friends. I think to call the interface "garbage" not only shows your lack of maturity, but it shows your unsolicited and baseless hatred for a product you don't even own or probably didn't have contact with.

It's more than capable of being an iPod nano replacement. It has a bigger screen, it plays video and still has a long battery life. In my opinion, your clamouring for the scroll wheel is a reach and shows you're just looking for flaws in the iPhone for whatever reason.

[bassplayinMacFiend]

Originally Posted by Kickaha Koodari - given that the life of the battery is measured in years, how often do you buy a new phone? Around 400 full charge cycles to drop to 80% capacity. Okay, figure you completely drain it and recharge it every single frickin' day - you're looking at about 13 months later, it being at 80%. Figure another year before you upgrade (2yr contract, remember?) and it's down to, oh 50%. That's with a full drain and recharge *every day*. Maybe that's your use pattern, I don't know, but I do know that I recharge my phone about 1-2x a week. At that rate, it'll be around 6 years, average, before it even drops to 80% capacity.

I've needed to recharge my iPhone every day since I bought it. I get down below 20% every day. So if the battery has dropped to 80% usefulness around August 5th, 2008 (roughly 400 days after purchase), then I'll either need to change how I use the device (which I'd rather not do, I bought the iPhone for a reason), or I'll have to constantly charge the device like I do with my 20GB iPod from 2002. Either way is not a scenario I like. So whether you want to admit it or not, the soldered-in battery will become an issue for many people.

According to ATT I can still upgrade when my previous contract is up, I don't have to wait until the 2 year iPhone contractual extension is up before getting a new phone and receiving any upgrade discounts available at that time.

[Banana]

Am I only one beside Roboman getting annoyed with the misspelling on the thread tittle?

[datapusher]

Originally Posted by tensdanny38 Maddox is the man. I no longer check his site either, Luca. He sold out and is now a millionaire from his book sales and whatnot. His stuff is still hilarious and very spot on, though. The other post about how Apple users cannot shut the fuck up defines about half the pretentious hipster "mac community". iPod replacement, robo? give me a break. You're buying into the exact marketing that Apple wants you to. The iPhone is one of the shittiest mp3 player on the market. Try using it to workout or run or do other real-life activities with it and you'll see the limitations. It takes all the good things about the iPod (scroll wheel, one click song change, etc) and ruins them. It is the anti-iPod. I hope to god they don't replace the current gen of iPods with a piece of garbage like the iPhone's version of the iPod.

I hope you're not running with a hard drive based iPod. If you are, then you're just about as dim as the rest of your post.

I think your trashing of the iPhone's iPod function shows you know nothing about it besides what you've seen on television/heard from your friends. I think to call the interface "garbage" not only shows your lack of maturity, but it shows your unsolicited and baseless hatred for a product you don't even own or probably didn't have contact with.

It's more than capable of being an iPod nano replacement. It has a bigger screen, it plays video and still has a long battery life. In my opinion, your clamouring for the scroll wheel is a reach and shows you're just looking for flaws in the iPhone for whatever reason.

[bassplayinMacFiend]

Originally Posted by Banana Am I only one beside Roboman getting annoyed with the misspelling on the thread tittle?

No.

[Kraetos]

Maddox? Who cares anymore?

I find it hard to believe people still email him about anything.

[psmith2.0]

I didn't find it very funny. Just seems old hat (and this is from someone who's quick to go on a rant a skootch himself).

[Koodari]

Originally Posted by Kickaha Koodari - given that the life of the battery is measured in years, how often do you buy a new phone? Around 400 full charge cycles to drop to 80% capacity. Okay, figure you completely drain it and recharge it every single frickin' day - you're looking at about 13 months later, it being at 80%. Figure another year before you upgrade (2yr contract, remember?) and it's down to, oh 50%. That's with a full drain and recharge *every day*. Maybe that's your use pattern, I don't know, but I do know that I recharge my phone about 1-2x a week. At that rate, it'll be around 6 years, average, before it even drops to 80% capacity.

I have bought my latest phones a couple years used, then used them for an average of maybe three years myself. The phones have broken on me before I have had to change batteries, but I don't know if the previous owners had changed them. My mom went through 3-4 batteries on her Nokia 3110. She had that phone for about 7-8 years. By then batteries had become too rare and expensive and the networks had been upgraded from 900MHz to 900/1800MHz so a new phone made sense.

I'd expect a combined player-browser-phone will have way heavier battery use than the average cellphone or even the average hard-to-use smartphone. bassplayinMacFiend's experience seems to correspond to that.

[Graphguy]

Originally Posted by torifile You're smoking something if you really think that the iPhone is a shitty music player.

I'm afraid you're the one who's smoking something. Compared to the regular iPod, the iPhone is shite... No drag and dropping files, no playing your music on other computers?!? These aren't even iPod-specific functions, this is stuf that I expect even the cheapest flashbased 50$ walmart-player can do, and which they can do.
iPhone? As an MP3 player it's an overpriced pos...

[Partial]

Originally Posted by Roboman You're totally right, tensdanny. Your way of seeing things is the only correct one. My viewpoint will never be valid because I am a naive college student who spends all my money on Apple gear because I can't help but fall for their marketing and hype.

While I agree with that notion, I never said that. Don't put words in my mouth. All I said is its a terrible iPod. And it is. It completely breaks from the essence of the iPod. I suspect in iPhone gen 2 you see the iPod version of it seriously revamped.

[Partial]

Originally Posted by torifile You're smoking something if you really think that the iPhone is a shitty music player. (And if you think Maddox is good writing or innovative in any way, you're not exactly a good judge of taste anyway.) It's fantastic. There are a few drawbacks to the interface changes but the listening experience is much more enhanced with the tactility of the interface. I love the way they've done the metaphorically "flipping" the CD to see what's on it and pick what you want to listen to. It's such a gratifying experience to browse through albums, all arranged alphabetically (the way I wish my real CD collection would be!) with album art so you can see what you're looking for. "Real world" usage? What do you do in the real world that makes selecting an album and putting the thing in your pocket difficult? The fact that you can adjust the volume or pause the playback without having to turn "hold" off are great usability enhancements. I don't know about you, but I walk far more than I run and there are still iPods out there, you know. I'm not going to get into debunking the shit you spewed about one touch song changes and whatnot but I'll only say you're wrong. I wonder if you're response is some sort of visceral one you've got whenever Roboman posts something. Get over it.

How does flipping for eye candy actually improve the experience? It doesn't, it provides more eye candy to show to your friends. In reality, it is pretty useless if you're already in the album you want to listen to.

Try running with the thing. I suspect you'll crash into something. That is my only usage for an MP3 player, and because of the hassel and difficulty to use (which are very anti-iPod), I don't think its a good product. Too many taps and slides to change songs. I suspect in the gen gen they will keep the screen always on for the iPod portion.

I don't like it as an MP3 player, and neither do many national publications. There is nothing wrong with being critical of a first gen apple product in hopes they will change it in the future.

Other than the iPod portion I think the phone is nice and a cool piece of technology but too rich for my blood. I did crash one but I am assuming that is just a minor software glitch to this point. I know you have one and I hope it serves you very well. It just is not the right product for my 5k running needs.

My main beef is the it is very hard to use without looking at it. When you're running, you don't want to take your eyes off the road. With this, you'll have to stop, turn your arm with the strap on, tap the screen to turn it on, slide across to unlock it, hit the iPod button on the button(only tactile button on the thing btw), then hit the next button?

With the old iPod and its tactile feedback(allowing you to do switch songs while running), you could do it with one click of a button.

How is that not a legitimate concern and me just picking on roboman?

[Partial]

Originally Posted by datapusher I hope you're not running with a hard drive based iPod. If you are, then you're just about as dim as the rest of your post. I think your trashing of the iPhone's iPod function shows you know nothing about it besides what you've seen on television/heard from your friends. I think to call the interface "garbage" not only shows your lack of maturity, but it shows your unsolicited and baseless hatred for a product you don't even own or probably didn't have contact with. It's more than capable of being an iPod nano replacement. It has a bigger screen, it plays video and still has a long battery life. In my opinion, your clamouring for the scroll wheel is a reach and shows you're just looking for flaws in the iPhone for whatever reason.

I run with an iPod mini all the time. Used it for about 3 years going out 4-5 times a week. Worked like a champion until recently when I dropped it for the 1000th time.

I don't think its as functional as strictly an iPod. Many publications agree with that. Does that make me a bad, mean or spiteful person? No, it makes me one who the new iPod does not fit my needs.

[Luca]

Originally Posted by pscates2.0 I didn't find it very funny. Just seems old hat (and this is from someone who's quick to go on a rant a skootch himself).

Shortest pscates post ever.

[sirnick4]

Originally Posted by tensdanny38 Too many taps and slides to change songs. I suspect in the gen gen they will keep the screen always on for the iPod portion.

Just double press the button on the headphones to advance to the next song. Can't get much easier than that.