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kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2016-08-02, 17:49

Quote:
Originally Posted by Dave View Post
I didn't realize we were so closed-minded.


Thanks for the laugh.
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pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2016-08-04, 08:01

When real life tops The Onion...
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Dave
Ninja Editor
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Bay Area, CA
 
2016-08-04, 10:10

Quote:
Originally Posted by pscates2.0 View Post
  quote
pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2016-08-04, 10:46

Maybe they could get one of those lithe gymnasts who are in town to scurry over a low gate/wall, and unlock the joint from the inside? You know, the way we sometimes have to break into our own house if we left our keys inside?

They would have to do it in a way that doesn't invite claims/accusations of favoritism, cheating, rule-bending, rigging, doping, corruption, various "-isms", etc., which may be a tall order for this bunch. Their safest, most hassle-free option might be to get a crane and just knock a hole in a couple of sections for spectators and others to enter. That would be my solution, should the keys not be located in a timely manner (didn't these puddingheads go to Ace or Home Depot and make some duplicates made for .99? Or was that just not in the budget?)
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kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2016-08-04, 13:06

I find it rather fitting that this year's Olympics so closely mirrors US politics.

Coincidence?
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PKIDelirium
Nobody bumps my lock
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Xenia, Ohio
 
2016-08-04, 23:01

Quote:
Originally Posted by pscates2.0 View Post
I saw the headline, I thought it was a joke. Then remembered it's Rio. And we thought Sochi was a screwup...
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Ryan
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Promise Land of Trustafarians
 
2016-08-04, 23:10

At this point, why would you want to be the host city?

Please never come to Denver.
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pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2016-08-05, 07:29

Continuing with the Rio Olympics fun...

Afterwards an Olympic official told reporters "hey, you know how all those anthems sound alike...", before disappearing into a feces-strewn alleyway with a hooker.
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kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2016-08-05, 09:40

Every venue is trying to outdo the last. We have finally reached the point where one-upmanship reveals itself as a total farce.

I plan on watching exactly zero events. And, since zero represents a complete lack of interest, I have time to laugh at the insanity of it all.

Remember when the Olympics were the, you know, *Olympics*? Now it's just an over-hyped, commercialized pro-event that's annoying to watch with all it's slow-mo over-analyzing and Coke commercials. If it all goes south, so be it.

- AppleNova is the best Mac-users forum on the internet. We are smart, educated, capable, and helpful. We are also loaded with smart-alecks! :)
- Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. (Mat 5:9)
  quote
kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2016-08-06, 12:26

Two things:

1) Don't give your children a name that starts with "De". Trouble will follow.

2) Why in Sam Hell Hill does an NBA player need to visit a brothel in Rio (or anywhere else for that matter)? Just go down to the beach, tell the g-string-clad beach whores who you are and BAM! Won't cost you a dime. And the best part: No headlines!

Oh, and 3) Good to see that USA Basketball can afford to rent a cruise ship for 12 spoiled basketball players and their 357 coaches and trainers.

- AppleNova is the best Mac-users forum on the internet. We are smart, educated, capable, and helpful. We are also loaded with smart-alecks! :)
- Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. (Mat 5:9)

Last edited by kscherer : 2016-08-06 at 20:55.
  quote
Kickaha
Likes his boobies blue.
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Hell
 
2016-08-06, 12:53

Quote:
Originally Posted by kscherer View Post
2) Why in Sam Hell does an NBA player need to visit a brothel in Rio (or anywhere else for that matter)? Just go down to the beach, tell the g-string-clad beach whores who you are and BAM! Won't cost you a dime. And the best part: No headlines!
It's Sam Hill. He was a railroad tycoon in the PNW. He built an estate for his wife out in the middle of nowhere on the Columbia Gorge, then went bankrupt. The Maryhill Museum holds her collection of Russian aristocracy memorabilia (she was a cousin of Tsar Nicholas II) including a large number of Faberge eggs, and it also houses a rather intriguing Rodin collection. She was friends with the sculptor, and he gave her his 'in progress' pieces as gifts. So you get to see how Fallen Caryatid morphed through his sketches in bronze. If you ever get a chance, go. It's near the 1/2 scale Stonehenge replica and the Goldendale Observatory.

Whorehouses are so there *aren't* headlines. As my prim and proper economics professors ex-father-in-law was fond of stating, "One does not pay a prostitute for sex. One pays a prostitute to leave discreetly." Beach Bimbo #3 is going to blab her fool mouth off. A prostitute is paid for their silence.

My other brain is hung like a horse too.
#IRC isn't old school.
Old school is being able to say 'finger me' with a straight face.
  quote
pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2016-08-06, 13:13

In theory, sure. But the allure of tabloid/TMZ/14-minutes-of-fame-for-boning-a-celebrity proves too strong for some.

If I were famous, I think I'd just be a serial/chronic tug artisan*. I can't rat myself out, or give myself the drip. The risk/hassle factor drops to almost zero, provided you remember to pull your shades.





I wonder sometimes if perhaps I share too much about myself here...



*Possible cool band name or male porn star pseudonym? "Hey, have you heard Tug Artisan's latest album?", etc.
  quote
kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2016-08-06, 20:53

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kickaha View Post
It's Sam Hill. He was a railroad tycoon in the PNW. He built an estate for his wife out in the middle of nowhere on the Columbia Gorge, then went bankrupt. The Maryhill Museum holds her collection of Russian aristocracy memorabilia (she was a cousin of Tsar Nicholas II) including a large number of Faberge eggs, and it also houses a rather intriguing Rodin collection. She was friends with the sculptor, and he gave her his 'in progress' pieces as gifts. So you get to see how Fallen Caryatid morphed through his sketches in bronze. If you ever get a chance, go. It's near the 1/2 scale Stonehenge replica and the Goldendale Observatory.
Thanks for the history lesson (change made). Driven by there a million times, never stopped. Only reason I ever had was for the wine sampling, but Columbia Gorge wineries are mostly swill, so I never bothered to cross the river. Next time, tho …

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kickaha View Post
Whorehouses are so there *aren't* headlines. As my prim and proper economics professors ex-father-in-law was fond of stating, "One does not pay a prostitute for sex. One pays a prostitute to leave discreetly." Beach Bimbo #3 is going to blab her fool mouth off. A prostitute is paid for their silence.
You may well be right about that. Until you're not, and this whole thing is in the news. Sometimes the story is too juicy … or pays more than the customer. Or perhaps in the age of cameras in every pocket (or out pointing at things) it would be smarter not to be seen walking into a place the locals would know only too well for what it is.

But who am I to know? Is there a smart way to do this? And don't you dare tell my wife I even asked!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by pscates2.0 View Post
In theory, sure. But the allure of tabloid/TMZ/14-minutes-of-fame-for-boning-a-celebrity proves too strong for some.

If I were famous, I think I'd just be a serial/chronic tug artisan*. I can't rat myself out, or give myself the drip. The risk/hassle factor drops to almost zero, provided you remember to pull your shades.





I wonder sometimes if perhaps I share too much about myself here...



*Possible cool band name or male porn star pseudonym? "Hey, have you heard Tug Artisan's latest album?", etc.
I'll stop laughing in the morning. Until then, I'm putting on Tug Artisans' latest tribute to Michael Jackson. Yep, I went there! But, you started it!

- AppleNova is the best Mac-users forum on the internet. We are smart, educated, capable, and helpful. We are also loaded with smart-alecks! :)
- Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God. (Mat 5:9)
  quote
Brave Ulysses
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
 
2016-08-07, 12:04

Quote:
Originally Posted by kscherer View Post
Thanks for the history lesson (change made). Driven by there a million times, never stopped. Only reason I ever had was for the wine sampling, but Columbia Gorge wineries are mostly swill, so I never bothered to cross the river. Next time, tho …
You must not have gone to the right places. Seems to be confirmed by the fact that you "never bothered to cross the river".
  quote
PKIDelirium
Nobody bumps my lock
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Xenia, Ohio
 
2016-08-07, 18:25

Can't make this stuff up...

A Sky News reporter tweeted that an Olympic kayaker on a practice run capsized after hitting a sofa
  quote
pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2016-08-07, 19:04

So "sofa" is Portuguese for "turd", I take it?

I like that the lead photo in the story is actually a file photo from over a year ago. Meaning, of course, living room furniture in that body of water isn't so rare or unusual that they don't already have a few pics on hand, already in the system, to accompany such a story.

"Hey, Rod...call up 'couch-0022654.jpg' - yeah, the cream double cushion - to put with that kayak story."

Last edited by pscates2.0 : 2016-08-07 at 19:14.
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kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2016-08-08, 14:30

You need to take a break from the news, man. Gonna fibrillate your heart.

Or something.

  quote
pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2016-08-08, 14:38

Good point. Deleted. Fuck 'em.

Last edited by pscates2.0 : 2016-08-08 at 15:47.
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kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2016-08-08, 16:39



Life is better when it's quiet. Which is why I don't own a cellphone.
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kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2016-08-16, 13:02

R2-D2 died, today.
  quote
tomoe
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Send a message via AIM to tomoe  
2016-08-16, 13:14

Meanwhile, in the latest rounds of neverending delusional GOP speeches, Rudy Giuliani forgets to take his Alzheimer's meds and proceeds to claim there were no successful terrorist attacks in the US before Obama.

Seen a man standin' over a dead dog lyin' by the highway in a ditch
He's lookin' down kinda puzzled pokin' that dog with a stick
  quote
Frank777
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Toronto
 
2016-08-16, 13:33

The minute I saw that quote I figured he was talking about lone wolf attacks. But it's Giuliani, so everyone's welcome to pile on.
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709
¡Damned!
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Purgatory
 
2016-08-16, 13:33

Quote:
Originally Posted by kscherer View Post
*last Saturday, but yeah. Sad bit of news, but not surprising that he's the first of the original young* cast to go, given his age and health (he was replaced in VIII due to health reasons).

* RIP Alec Guinness

So it goes.
  quote
Elysium
Environmental Bloodhound
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Land of ice and snow
Send a message via AIM to Elysium  
2016-08-16, 16:43

He didn't forget to take his meds. He just confirmed that they were all false flag operations!

Quick somebody hide him before the Clintons have him killed.












Formerly known as cynical_rock
censeo tentatio victum
There is no snooze button on a cat.
  quote
709
¡Damned!
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Purgatory
 
2016-08-16, 17:08

ZOMG 9/11 WAS AN INSIDE JOB I KNEW IT ALL ALONG
  quote
pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2016-08-17, 10:04

IOC executive committee member arrested in Rio.

Hooker/cocaine orgy? Throwing a burger wrapper into the pristine bay (upsetting the delicate ecological balance between body parts and discarded furniture)? Fighting back against a(nother) mugger and taking it a bit too far? Exposing his Irish wang to the female volleyball teams in the Olympic Village?

Nope, nothing nearly that predictable (or reasonable).

Quote:
Rio de Janeiro authorities arrested IOC executive committee member Patrick Hickey on Wednesday morning, according to multiple reports. The head of the European Olympic committee is being accused of illegally scalping tickets for the Summer Games currently being held in Rio.


"Yo, yo...I gots two for the javelins an' shit. What you lookin' for, my man?"

What a goon. A fine, upstanding bunch, these IOC folks.
  quote
Ryan
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Promise Land of Trustafarians
 
2016-08-17, 10:21

edit: wrong thread
  quote
709
¡Damned!
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Purgatory
 
2016-08-17, 12:31

Catfish vs. Mongoose

WTF is up with this guy? His wife by all accounts is an intelligent, decent person, and not at all unattractive. Does he just have that creep itch that needs to get scratched? After his congressional resignation for #1 and his mayoral loss for #2 what in the hell goes through his head that he thinks "eh, this is fine to do."

Dumbass Crypt-Keeper-faced moron.

So it goes.
  quote
pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2016-08-17, 12:43

Yeah, he's a real piece of work. No shame whatsoever.

His dumb-ass wife - who'll no-doubt cash in her put-upon "victim" card at some point, if/when it helps her boss at the polls - isn't much better.

Talk about two knuckleheads who completely deserve one another. Zero sympathy for either, at this point. They both know what each other's deal is, so...screw 'em. If she's okay with him pulling his schlong out to - and trying to put it into - everyone who isn't her, I guess I should be too. Maybe they can get a couple's discount on Valtrex.

At least Eliot Spitzer's hot wife had the good sense to leave his lame ass after he betrayed and embarrassed the hell out of her.
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