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Facebook looking to open retail stores...


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Facebook looking to open retail stores...
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psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2021-11-05, 10:48

Facebook wants to open "welcoming" retail stores where people can experience the Metaverse.



I'm sure they do.

That pic...like Peyton Manning and Mr. Potato Head had a son.

That part about customers handing over their wallets (with drivers license, SSN card, credit cards, medical/insurance info, etc. inside) upon entering, I found a bit odd.



Okay, I made that up. But did I? The places aren't open yet, but, Facebook being Facebook, that may very well be the price of admission into their "retail experience".

"Do you want my daughter's first tooth too? Because I can do that...hell, it's about to come out anyway."

Quote:
Facebook, now rebranded to Meta, is looking to open physical retail stores where customers will be able to experience the wide range of products it has to offer, such as Oculus headsets, in a "welcoming" and "judgment-free" experience, according to a new report from The New York Times.
Someone voluntarily hanging out in a Facebook store probably needs to be judged.

Quote:
The report says that Facebook executives began floating the idea of a physical retail store last year, but following the company's rebrand to "Meta," the project is now gaining a little more steam. Early designs of the store showcase a minimal and modern design, according to The New York Times, with Meta wanting customers to feel curious and close. The company has considered a few names for its chain of stores, with "Facebook Store" being a top preference.
Two of those things sound really familiar. It's not enough that Samsung bases their every move on Cupertino, now The Zuck is going to climb on that train too.

And will there be a Bullshit Bar, staffed by (diverse) brother-in-law types, there to dispense half-baked, outright wrong statements about every topic under the sun (politics, lawnmower hacks, college football analysis, "why TV is so full of fags all of a sudden", etc.)? Because you can't get the full Facebook experience without that!

Quote:
The aim of the stores is to make the world "more open and connected," according to the company documents viewed by The Times. They are also intended to spark emotions like "curiosity, closeness," as well as a sense of feeling "welcomed" while experimenting with headsets in a "judgment-free journey," according to the documents.
Until the divorced dads, assembled neckbeards and local registered pervs/sex offenders pull their pants down as they're air-banging Carla Gugino in the middle of the store.

"Sir, we'd ask that you VR-diddle hot celebrities in the privacy of your home."

"Give me 40 more seconds...".

Quote:
Early designs for Meta's stores appeared modern, with a flat, minimalist aesthetic to the building exteriors and subtle placement of the Facebook brand [Oh I'm sure - Paul], according to the documents. The company considered naming its stores Facebook Hub, Facebook Commons, Facebook Innovations, Facebook Reality Store and From Facebook, before eventually settling on the Facebook Store as a leading candidate, the documents said.
Every one of those names somehow manages to be worse than the one before it!

I can think of a few more but they wouldn't fit on the building/storefront, or pass local obscenity laws.

Quote:
Earlier this week, possibly in an attempt to sway public opinion and scrutiny, Facebook said it would stop facial recognition on 1 billion users, and delete all of the current data it has. A few days later, Meta clarified that it itself, as the "metaverse" company, will not be doing the same. Instead, Meta is already "exploring ways to incorporate biometrics into its emerging metaverse business."


Ah, the ol' switcheroo!

Don't Listen to What We Say, Stare in Disbelief at What We Actually Do...Now Bend Over and Spread 'Em!™

"We said that Facebook, your selfie/validation-from-strangers HQ, isn't going to crawl up your ass on the daily. But we never said Meta, the overall company, didn't have every intention of doing so! You're not listening...".

It hasn't even been a week and they're already being shady and full of crap.
  quote
kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2021-11-05, 10:54

Quote:
Originally Posted by psmith2.0 View Post
I can think of a few more but they wouldn't fit on the building/storefront, or pass local obscenity laws.
Welcome to Fuckface, sir.
  quote
psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2021-11-05, 11:01

I have a feeling the next 1-2 years are going to be hilarious on the Facebook/Meta front.

They're going to say/do so many goofy things. It'll be awesome!
  quote
turtle
Lord of the Rant.
Formerly turtle2472
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Upstate South Carolina
 
2021-11-05, 13:32

I'm sure they won't ask for anything from you. They will offer you a drink and collect your trash for you so they can sample your DNA though...


Louis L'Amour, “To make democracy work, we must be a notion of participants, not simply observers. One who does not vote has no right to complain.”
MineCraft? mc.applenova.com | Visit us! | Maybe someday I'll proof read, until then deal with it.
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PB PM
Sneaky Punk
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Vancouver, BC
Send a message via Skype™ to PB PM 
2021-11-05, 15:20

Facebook, Meta, store.

You’ll have to log into your Facebook account (via QR code) just to go in.
  quote
_Ω_
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
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2021-11-05, 19:08

I wonder if they will have helpful sections inside?

Aisle of Hate Speech
Misinformation Corner
The Slave Trader Pens
Insurrection Innovations

No doubt the "help" desk will be called "Q", short for questions of course...

Angels bleed from the tainted touch of my caress
  quote
psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2021-11-09, 08:39

Two years from now, none of this will have panned out and none of it will be a thing, outside a handful of people. Just watch.

I just don’t think this outfit is the one people will throw in with. There’s just something forever-creepy/lame about them. Too much ill will, “you can’t trust us” and “WTF?!” just hangs over this bunch.

All this company is good for is that one thing they’re known for, and once its addicted, older-skewing base dies off (or finally realize what’s what), this goofy company will fade like a fart in Macy’s.

It’ll be the 2020’s MySpace, I truly believe. There’s just nothing there. Its deluded CEO thinks far too highly of it.
  quote
psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2021-11-09, 09:05

On a related note - same outfit, right? - you’ll soon get to pay to look at your favorite attention whores, selfie artisans and check-out-my-camel-toe-while-I-cringe-dance mental patients.

I think a bunch of “creators” are in for a shock/rude awakening. Everyone loves you when you give it away for free, sweetie. Most won’t pay to experience your shallow narcissism and vocal fry.

It'll basically be OnlyFans, minus any actual goods. Yeah, that's what everyone is eager to pay for!

"I can almost see her nipple if I squint...here, take my money!"

I'll take Things That Will Never Happen for $600, Alex.

Last edited by psmith2.0 : 2021-11-09 at 09:29.
  quote
PB PM
Sneaky Punk
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Vancouver, BC
Send a message via Skype™ to PB PM 
2021-11-09, 10:19

Quote:
Originally Posted by psmith2.0 View Post
Two years from now, none of this will have panned out and none of it will be a thing, outside a handful of people. Just watch.
I wish, but people are hooked, even if they know Facebook is evil can they detach themselves from the tit?
  quote
psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2021-11-09, 10:33

I think Facebook, the social media thing we all know, will eventually fade as its older user base does, sure.

But I'm mainly talking about all this new, "Meta" stuff being anything anyone gives a flip about in any real, tangible way. Facebook's - sorry, Meta's - only real "hook" is that goofy social media thing, and it won't - can't - last forever.

Any other company, maybe. Not Facebook/Meta. They've shit in everyone's mouths a bit too much over the years for sane, rational people to follow them on new journeys, IMO. But maybe my faith in humans is way too high and I'll be spectacularly, tragically wrong about it.
  quote
emmasophia
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I am a filthy spammer.
 
Join Date: Nov 2021
 
2021-11-24, 07:25

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I lika-a-da-Tolahdo!

Last edited by kscherer : 2021-11-24 at 11:58.
  quote
psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2021-11-24, 07:57

You like Toledo and I like Tolahdo
You like Toledo and I like Tolahdo
Toledo, Tolahdo, Toledo, Tolahdo.
Let's call the whole thing off
  quote
turtle
Lord of the Rant.
Formerly turtle2472
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Upstate South Carolina
 
2021-11-24, 08:47

  quote
PB PM
Sneaky Punk
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Vancouver, BC
Send a message via Skype™ to PB PM 
2021-11-24, 10:18

Quote:
Originally Posted by psmith2.0 View Post
You like Toledo and I like Tolahdo
You like Toledo and I like Tolahdo
Toledo, Tolahdo, Toledo, Tolahdo.
Let's call the whole thing off
Never, what happens in Toledo, cannot stay in Toledo. This isn’t Vagus baby!
  quote
kscherer
The Ban Hammer
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Boyzeee
 
2021-11-24, 11:58

I think this Toledo business might be the best thing that ever happened to the Forum.
  quote
psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2021-11-25, 11:35

There once was a ‘bot from Toledo
Annoying as any mosquito
Hawking their wares
Like anyone cares
Don’t make me go Han to your Greedo




I'm a poet for our times, and I take the responsibility seriously. Where's my pipe?

  quote
PB PM
Sneaky Punk
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Vancouver, BC
Send a message via Skype™ to PB PM 
2021-11-25, 11:40

You know what they say about poets, they are only recognized for their greatness after they die. Better put this stuff in your will so the family can benefit later.
  quote
psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2021-11-25, 11:48

Absolutely!
  quote
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