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Commercials you love or hate
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-05, 14:54

No bottles of liquor on the airplane for sure.

If you can't bring the loot in unless it's from duty free, then bring an easily-flattened empty duffle bag with you, break it out of the suitcase once you're through customs, stuff your bottles or box in there and smile innocently in the knowledge you're depriving a cab driver of 72 virgins. Allah does not forgive such careless oversights. The cabby should've *known* not to work in a land full of devils and drunks! By the way, what do good Muslim women get when they die, 72 consecutive orgasms? 72 shiny new bathing suits that they were never allowed to wear in life? 72 Oven mits? Seems patently unfair to give dead guys endless heavenly sex but not give women something comparable. Or do women still have to wear burlap bags over their bodies in heaven?

Oh wait, wait wait... I know. Upon dying and reaching heaven, all women are -of course- given back their virgin bodies so that they can service all the dead guys. I get in now. It's all clear to me.

...into the light of a dark black night.
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-05, 15:04

Getting back on topic, this ad is NSFW (language) but is pretty damn funny.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...76143531081352
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Windswept
On Pacific time
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Moderator's Pub
 
2007-01-05, 15:19

Quote:
Originally Posted by Moogs View Post
Getting back on topic, this ad is NSFW (language) but is pretty damn funny.

http://video.google.com/videoplay?do...76143531081352


Oh, that *is* funny. haha
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torifile
Less than Stellar Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Durham, NC
Send a message via AIM to torifile  
2007-01-25, 00:29

That fucking stupid Office Depot commercial. "Whoa, oh. Office Depot.... We'll give you a hand." It grates on me. I hate it.

First, it's creepy that there's this disembodied hand sticking out of box. Second, the song is shrill. Third, it's an annoying jingle. I'm never shopping at OD again.

Can you tell I hate that commercial? (I just saw it again while watching Letterman.)

If it's not red and showing substantial musculature, you're wearing it wrong.
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Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2007-01-25, 01:52

All-time favorite commercials:

Ok, so we don't really watch t.v. Have lots more fun things we would rather do, ( ) so we just don't have it in our home. (Yep I guess this *should* be mentioned in the "Weird is a Relative Word" thread!) Anyway, point being, most of my favorites are either ancient, or were never actually aired, but I find them to be hilarious.

1) Levi's commercial from yeeeaars ago: Man in shower (all you can see is human-shaped shadow amidst billows of steam) singing in a lovely baritone voice. Narrator yaps about the perfection of the 501's or the like. In the background, you hear said man exiting shower while continuing to sing. A split-second pause in the performance, the zing of a zipper being closed, and his singing suddenly resembles that of a Ritchie Valens falsetto rif! The narrator's question of the day hangs pointedly at the conclusion: "Are *your* jeans a bit *tight*?!

2) The Mastercard Blow-job commercial (If you haven't seen it, *find* it!)

3) Some Australian commercial for a Yoo-hoo like substance: Girl in slinky sprayed on sequin 'dress' flaunting her body to get her boyfriend's (who is watching t.v.) attention. Unsuccessful, she asks: "Does this make my bum look big?" With a 'No duh' expression on his face, he casually glances over, drink in hand and says: "Yah... but at least it takes the focus off your face!"

Good laugh therapy on all three counts.

Last edited by Freewell : 2007-01-25 at 02:02.
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-25, 18:17

There's a new Enzyte ad I've seen the last couple nights that is friggin hilarious. It's Enzyte Bob as Santa, with the following highlights:

1. Woman holding North Pole sign steps behind another cast member so only "pole" is showing.

2. Announcer at one point says "Sack full of confidence"

3. Announcer at another point says "Help for this Chubby Santa"

4. Announcer says "That special gift every woman wants" or something similar and they show this line up of horny housewives all twitchy, then Bob does the gigantic grin thing



...and the first chic sits on his lap. Can't find it anywhere on YouTube but you can probably imagine it pretty clearly based on the music and announcer from the other ads.

...into the light of a dark black night.
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-25, 18:27

In the hatred category, almost anything from Old Navy or Target. Orbitz ads suck rhino-balls too.
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Windswept
On Pacific time
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Moderator's Pub
 
2007-01-25, 18:36

God, I saw two good commercials last night that I meant to remember for today, but... my mind is a complete blank.

Guess I'll have to take notes the next time I watch tv.
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rasmits
rams it
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Seattle
 
2007-01-25, 18:46

Are Safeway grocery stores nationwide? I just saw their new commercial last night.

It looks like a bunch of paper cutouts of real people's faces on fake bodies, but the looks on their faces are all seriously satanic. I don't know who the hell thinks that's a good way to get people into a grocery store.

You had me at asl
.......
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pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2007-01-25, 18:48

Some of those Old Navy ads from this past summer were neat ("My Summertime Girlfriend" and the "madras" one...lots of cutie-pies dancing around in their little dresses and shorts).

The older ones from a few years ago with Morgan Fairchild and the Jeffersons...now those were annoying!



I like funny commercials. Quite a few of them out there.

However, I think Super Bowl commercials have gotten silly and out of hand. It's not funny when you try so hard to be "wacky" or cutting edge. I haven't seen a truly clever (or good) Super Bowl commercial that didn't make me go or in years.
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Partial
Stallion
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Milwaukee
 
2007-01-25, 19:39

NFL Network Commercials are the best on TV. They're really, really funny if you watch a lot of football.

LTs pretty good... between the 20's!!
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Windswept
On Pacific time
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Moderator's Pub
 
2007-01-25, 20:14

Okay... this just occurred to me yesterday.

I'm sure everyone has seen that Rozerem commercial about insomnia, where the sleepless guy comes into the kitchen, and Abraham Lincoln, an astronaut, etc. (entities from his dreams) are there waiting for him.

Well, the surly little creature hunched over the plate of bacon and eggs, who says "Whatever" in the most sullen way...

Um... did you ever wonder why that creature is there? And why he's doing what he's doing? And what it means?

Like I said, it just occurred to me last night. So I thought I'd ask if the same meaning occurred to any of you.
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World Leader Pretend
Ruling teh World
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Boston, MA
 
2007-01-25, 22:40

A beaver?
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-26, 08:58

Yep. A beaver.

Abe and the Beav symbolize all the weird stuff people dream about when they're sleeping (I think), and this guy has insomnia so... I dunno. Forget exactly how the commercial goes but I think the Beaver is like "yah, we miss you" or something like that. Meaning take the pill being peddled and the guy can go back to dreaming about Mrs. Lincoln's beaver... or something.

Personally my dreams of late have been totally off the wall. Usually I don't remember anything about my dreams but whenever I have chili or some other high-octane food / or I eat too much for dinner / or I eat dinner late... Dr. Synaptix and the Funkadelics come to town. My wife said I was doing a combo snore/angry yell the other night. I'm sure that was a great comfort to her. Especially since I normally don't snore in the traditional, pig-snort sense of the word.

...into the light of a dark black night.
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709
¬°Damned!
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Purgatory
 
2007-01-26, 15:01

I love the beaver skit. I hatwe Old Navy shit and the like...though I loves me the Target spots. Seerioisly, being in the biz and all they are quite good.

So it goes.
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zippy
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Unknown
 
2007-01-26, 16:09

I love this Dodge Caliber commercial.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyyii8cypFw

"It scares the **** outta me."

There's another ad for the same car that's not quite as funny, but funny still.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNVXe...elated&search=

Do you know where children get all of their energy? - They suck it right out of their parents!
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-26, 19:23

Oh yah that reminds me. Any truck ad with Toby Keith or the words "that thing got a hemi? Sweeeet!" in it, deserve to burn.
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pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2007-01-26, 19:33

I despise that idiot (Toby Keith). I have since the first time I became ware of his dumb ass. I'm in the same boat with him and his "feud" with the Dixie Chicks as I am with Donald Trump and Rosie: I can't stand either side and I wish they'd both off each other. Shitheads all around...no one to root for in any of that nonsense.



In those Ford truck commercials, they try to position him as such a blue-collar bad-ass/he-man (as if). Makes me want to hurl a brick at the TV. Coming as no surprise, I'm sure, they play those spots a lot during NASCAR races, but I can't stand them. I'm not in that demographic...

A couple of you might want to disagree, but trust me.

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Robo
Formerly Roboman, still
awesome
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Portland, OR
 
2007-01-27, 02:05

Quote:
Originally Posted by torifile View Post
That fucking stupid Office Depot commercial. "Whoa, oh. Office Depot.... We'll give you a hand." It grates on me. I hate it.

First, it's creepy that there's this disembodied hand sticking out of box. Second, the song is shrill. Third, it's an annoying jingle. I'm never shopping at OD again.

Can you tell I hate that commercial? (I just saw it again while watching Letterman.)
It's also a total ripoff of Staple's "Easy Button," if you think about it.

Anyway, I despise those Chevy "This is Our Country - This is Our Truck" ads. It's like, you're not American if you buy a Tundra or something. The entire ad is American back-patting, which - quite frankly - I'm not sure we deserve. It also says nothing notable about the product, only that it's American, and thus, better. It actually makes me want to avoid buying the product in question, much like that "Pixie" Calibur ad.

and i guess i've known it all along / the truth is, you have to be soft to be strong
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-27, 09:02

Yah, I actually have a little bit of respect for the guys driving around in Nissan Titans and Toyota Tundras, because it means they have enough brains to actually look at all the options and decide which truck is actually best for them, American name or no. What's more most of these vehicles are made in the US, with many US parts anyway. I think basically the most critical parts of the structure and powerplant are forged in Japan and shipped over, then the rest of the parts come from here and all the jobs come from here. Subaru does the same thing, and it friggin WORKS. (Are you listening Detroit?)

All this "gotta buy American" bullshit has got to die NOW. Get your heads out of your butts, flag-waving hill-billys. Time to get over the mindset that spawned window stickers with Calvin peeing on your hated rival truck company. Ironically, the company that makes the peeing Calvin stickers,is smart enough to realize that Ford, Chevy and Ram ALL deserve to be pissed on, but the drivers of the trucks still haven't made that connection yet.

It's called free markets and competition. Don't buy American unless the American product is the *better* product, otherwise they'll keep turning out shit. And judging by the maintenance horror stories I hear when I travel out west -where everyone owns a damn truck- Made in America still means "it's in the shop at least 2 weeks a year".

Strangely, I never hear stories like this about Toyota or Nissan trucks. Not that they're perfect, but Japanese engineering is Japanese engineering. They pwn us in pretty much all categories of automotive design and factory efficiency. You'd think after taking a few pages from their play book in the early 90s and changing our factories and such, that we'd put out equally high quality vehicles on average but I guess not. Ford took a $12B loss last year... obviously Detroit still has its head stuck in its rectum.

I have a friend who when buying a new vehicle for his growing family wouldn't even *look* at a Japanese car company. Somewhere along the line his parents brain-washed him and now he thinks it's his patriotic duty to buy American, otherwise he's "hurting our economy". Boggles the mind that people think like this. You want to help our auto makers? Give them an incentive to make higher quality vehicles, beyond just the way it looks. Buy Japanese.

...into the light of a dark black night.
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-27, 09:14

Getting back on track, the makers of these commercials

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w9E4I_Y6lqw

deserve to have their eyes gouged out. Couldn't find the one with the yuppy asshole who is supposedly an aircraft designer, and evidently drives to and from work across the fucking mohave desert, on a motorcycle (!), because "Life's demanding, and I THRIVE on it. That's why I take Centrum." Yah? I hope you drive your motorcycle into a giant fucking cactus, butthole. Thrive on that. I hear Cactus Juice is packed with nutrients, DOOOD.

Wheres the "stomp yer guts out" smiley when I need one.

...into the light of a dark black night.
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Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2007-01-28, 14:59

Cynical, but funny, Moogs...very funny!

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pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2007-01-28, 15:41

I realize the deep irony of this coming from me and all, but moogs...take a pill.



Save those really strong "torqued-up moments" for the things that truly warrant it. Gets more traction, etc.

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Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2007-01-28, 15:47

Aw, he's alright, Paul... Pent up testosterone lends a unique perspective to life all its own!
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Brave Ulysses
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
 
2007-01-28, 16:07

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roboman View Post
It's also a total ripoff of Staple's "Easy Button," if you think about it.

Anyway, I despise those Chevy "This is Our Country - This is Our Truck" ads. It's like, you're not American if you buy a Tundra or something. The entire ad is American back-patting, which - quite frankly - I'm not sure we deserve. It also says nothing notable about the product, only that it's American, and thus, better. It actually makes me want to avoid buying the product in question, much like that "Pixie" Calibur ad.
Not sure why you despise them... there is nothing wrong with patriotism and pride. It's what this country was built on, and it's what carried the country through its hardest times as well as its most productive times.

It's not saying that it's American and it's better, it's simply saying it is American, and therefore supporting the American economy, and more specifically, American worker, better than most other options. By looking at Chevy and Ford you can make a pretty amazing narrative of American 20th century history.

And at a time when both companies are suffering massive losses, laying off thousands, and struggling to see a turn around in the future, I don't think there is anything wrong with an ad that brings to light history, and that they are an American brand.

Not sure we deserve? Leave your politics and recent war efforts out of it. You can be proud of your country and against Bush or against the war in Iraq at the same time.

Quote:
Yah, I actually have a little bit of respect for the guys driving around in Nissan Titans and Toyota Tundras, because it means they have enough brains to actually look at all the options and decide which truck is actually best for them, American name or no.
Actually, it probably just came down to them being cheaper. If American car companies still have anything that they are doing right, it's that they know how to make a truck.

Quote:
It's called free markets and competition. Don't buy American unless the American product is the *better* product, otherwise they'll keep turning out shit. And judging by the maintenance horror stories I hear when I travel out west -where everyone owns a damn truck- Made in America still means "it's in the shop at least 2 weeks a year".
Once again you post with your emotions. Just look at the effect Walmart has had on America. Free market huh? Don't buy American unless its better huh?

At least if you buy something made in America you can be fairly sure the people who made it made at least minimum wage and have some sort of livable life. The same can't be said for most other crap.

Quote:
Strangely, I never hear stories like this about Toyota or Nissan trucks. Not that they're perfect, but Japanese engineering is Japanese engineering. They pwn us in pretty much all categories of automotive design and factory efficiency. You'd think after taking a few pages from their play book in the early 90s and changing our factories and such, that we'd put out equally high quality vehicles on average but I guess not. Ford took a $12B loss last year... obviously Detroit still has its head stuck in its rectum.
I guess it would be hard for you to hear as many horror stories when the marketshare of American trucks far outweighs those of foreign. It's kind of like Apple vs. PCs. I'm sure you would say you have heard of far fewer hardware issues with macs than pc friends. No surprise.
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MacAgain
New Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Seattle, WA
 
2007-01-29, 00:34

Quote:
Originally Posted by Roboman View Post
Anyway, I despise those Chevy "This is Our Country - This is Our Truck" ads. It's like, you're not American if you buy a Tundra or something. The entire ad is American back-patting, which - quite frankly - I'm not sure we deserve. It also says nothing notable about the product, only that it's American, and thus, better. It actually makes me want to avoid buying the product in question, much like that "Pixie" Calibur ad.
The funny part about the Chevy ads is that they run the exact same ads in Canada. So, there's saying you're not a North American if you don't buy a Chevy.

It's not even about the good ol' USA.
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-01-29, 09:06

Quote:
Originally Posted by pscates2.0 View Post
I realize the deep irony of this coming from me and all, but moogs...take a pill.



Save those really strong "torqued-up moments" for the things that truly warrant it. Gets more traction, etc.


It's your fault, bub. That's right. Your fault.

You started me down the path last week of pondering how much I hate yuppies. It's a deep-seated sort of anger that normally lies dormant for months at a time, since I no longer work with "winners" like this every day... but once upon a time I did work with some people like that. The whole facade these people build up around themselves... how they convince themselves that [40s radio announcer guy]"I'm a uniquely well-rounded and successful person whose story deserves to be shared with eh-veryone, as often as possiblllllle!"[/40s radio announcer guy]. That's what drives the hate my man... and that's exactly what that one Centrum commercial reminds me of. To a T.

I suppose rather than deserving to have their eyes gouged out, it might suffice to merely suction them out with a high-powered vacuum. All right, all right. We'll save that for the murderous thieves and rapist thread. How about... they deserve to be beaten into unconsciousness with a frozen tuna?

...into the light of a dark black night.
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Elysium
Environmental Bloodhound
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Land of ice and snow
Send a message via AIM to Elysium  
2007-01-29, 09:14

Quote:
Originally Posted by Moogs View Post
It's your fault, bub. That's right. Your fault.

You started me down the path last week of pondering how much I hate yuppies. It's a deep-seated sort of anger that normally lies dormant for months at a time, since I no longer work with "winners" like this every day... but once upon a time I did work with some people like that. The whole facade these people build up around themselves... how they convince themselves that [40s radio announcer guy]"I'm a uniquely well-rounded and successful person whose story deserves to be shared with eh-veryone, as often as possiblllllle!"[/40s radio announcer guy]. That's what drives the hate my man... and that's exactly what that one Centrum commercial reminds me of. To a T.

I suppose rather than deserving to have their eyes gouged out, it might suffice to merely suction them out with a high-powered vacuum. All right, all right. We'll save that for the murderous thieves and rapist thread. How about... they deserve to be beaten into unconsciousness with a frozen tuna?
I'm thinking halibut. More surface area, you know.
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pscates2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2007-01-29, 09:19

Sounds good.
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turtle
Lord of the Rant.
Formerly turtle2472
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Tidewater Virginia
 
2007-01-29, 10:25

One to remind you all to actually discipline your kids.....or not have any.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nojWJ6-XmeQ
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