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Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2009-05-02, 20:51

Quote:
Originally Posted by drewprops View Post


I'll kick anybody's ass who DOES jam something up their pee-hole without provocation. A better way of showing solidarity is to begin having your prostate exam in your mid/late 30's or early 40s at the very latest.

You girls have to email me pictures of your bums.


Okay, that's it.




...
Oh man... Wish I had known before I shredded them all! I figured being engaged to the jerk almost 15 years ago was bad enough, I didn't need his likeness cluttering my storage unit! So sorry man! (But TRUST me... He was NOTHING to look at!!! )
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Luca
ಠ_ರೃ
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Minnesota
 
2009-05-03, 11:17

Quote:
Originally Posted by Freewell View Post
Hmm... Well, I'm fresh out of the appropriate plumbing required to truly participate in this charming little ritualistic honorarium, but how 'bout if I go get myself knocked up, then shove some 8 or 9 lb mass of bones, flesh and accompanying wrapping materials out the opposite direction?! Will that do?!? I can still do the whole catheter thing as well!!!





Man... The things I do for you guys!!
LOL, I bet you'd do that even if we didn't ask you to. Sicko!
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Hassan i Sabbah
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: london and københavn
 
2009-05-03, 11:31

Quote:
Originally Posted by drewprops View Post


I'll kick anybody's ass who DOES jam something up their pee-hole without provocation. A better way of showing solidarity is to begin having your prostate exam in your mid/late 30's or early 40s at the very latest.

You girls have to email me pictures of your bums.

Okay, that's it.

...
Well I guess you're going to have to kick my ass, Mr 'Let's All Stick Something Up Our Pee Holes in Solidarity'. I've been practicing for nearly a week now.

For fuck's sake, drew.

gibberish
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addabox
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: oaktown
 
2009-05-03, 11:51

Being able to stick something up your pee hole is a trade. Just because the solidarity stickage has been cancelled doesn't mean it won't come in handy down the road.

Dewprops: after posting here a bit in Ye Olde Early Days I wandered off, so I don't know you well, but I genuinely send you my best and most heartfelt wishes for a speedy and complete recovery.

That which doesn't kill you weakens you slightly and makes you less able to cope until you're completely incapacitated
  quote
Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2009-05-03, 13:52

Quote:
Originally Posted by Luca View Post
LOL, I bet you'd do that even if we didn't ask you to. Sicko!

Hey, just trying to keep it sporting!




Of course, just for giggles, we could swap tasks, and I could shove a long rod or tube into mine, and you could have the joy of producing a 8-9 lb human Erector Set through yours!! ...

Come to think of it, I wouldn't mind that one bit... and I know the perfect 'Doc' to see for such a delicate procedure!!!




Last edited by Freewell : 2009-05-03 at 14:18.
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crazychester
Dick in the Abstentia, The
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2009-05-03, 15:13

I will send you a picture of my tits when I find it to show you I am not really mad at you at all and because it's better than sticking something up my peehole.

Of course, this assumes ast3r3x or Bryson haven't already given you a copy of them.

Yes, I know, I'm very generous. No need to thank me. Your prompt attendance to your medical needs are all the thanks I require. If I was Freewell, I'd have a blowing kiss smiley to insert here. But I'm not. So I don't. Still I'm sure you get the picture nevertheless.
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zsummers
Avast!
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: New York?
 
2009-05-03, 18:07

Okay, well, since we're not sticking tubes into our tubes to show solidarity anymore, how about we stick our tubes into tubes instead?

First, for the fun...



Now... for the less fun.



Yes. Yes that is an electric-buzzer in the second image, connected to a metal post which extends into the tube... I let you guess for what.

But talk about when masturbation's lost its fun...

"How could you falter / when you're the Rock of Gibralter? / I had to get off the boat so I could walk on water. / This ain't no tall order. / This is nothing to me. / Difficult takes a day. / Impossible takes a week."
  quote
Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2009-05-03, 20:46

Ewwww...

You know, I guess I am just an old-fashioned kind of girl... I prefer authenticity to substitutes any day!!!



That said, all this talk of poles and holes, and I do believe Drew's thread is getting way-laid here!
  quote
drewprops
Bastard
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Atlanta
 
2009-05-03, 21:13

Well... actually.... one of the frightening aspects of this surgery is that the nerves that supply sensation to a man's orgasm sort of wrap around the prostate. As I understand it, the surgery requires that those nerves be teased loose from around the prostate. That's why impotence IS a possibility. A month or three after the surgery they start you up on Viagra or Cialis to keep your buddy boy from atrophying.

Trying to get and sustain a boner will be my goal for the rest of the year. Plus, they go all snip-snip on the vas deferens, meaning that it's the ultimate vasectomy. I'll be banking some sperm, but from the surgery thereafter I'll be having "dry orgasms".... nothing to "show" for the effort, or to "share" with the girl... which is going to be a really awkward to explain when I get back out into the dating world.

...

Steve Jobs ate my cat's watermelon.
Captain Drew on Twitter
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2009-05-03, 21:37

Quote:
Originally Posted by drewprops View Post
A better way of showing solidarity is to begin having your prostate exam in your mid/late 30's or early 40s at the very latest.
Now that's a solidarity movement worth fighting for. I will have mine checked this year probably... if I don't chicken out.
  quote
crazychester
Dick in the Abstentia, The
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2009-05-03, 21:44

Quote:
Originally Posted by drewprops View Post
<snip - that really isn't intended as a very bad joke, babe>

I'll be banking some sperm, but from the surgery thereafter I'll be having "dry orgasms".... nothing to "show" for the effort, or to "share" with the girl... which is going to be a really awkward to explain when I get back out into the dating world.

...
I never thought of that. But trying to imagine it, and speaking personally, I'm inclined to think I might somewhat prefer it. It doesn't really add anything to the experience except a lot of mess and the interminably irritating wet spot. It's certainly not anywhere near the top of the list as far as what I want to be shown for the effort.

If you squirted out a couple of chocolate truffles, some nice crispy bacon or a serving of prawn laksa that could be retrieved, I'd probably feel differently. But you don't. You squirt out some gooey, sticky, salty pretty awful tasting stuff that, other than for making babies, is only useful as hair gel or a fairly weak glue.
  quote
Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2009-05-03, 23:21

chester, you're hilarious!!!!

Wow Drew... I had no idea how intricate a surgery it is!! In all seriousness, I really do hope your firmware pulls through without any Col. Panics!! As far as dry shooting, well... I think chester has a valid point... If you're not aiming to have any little curtain-climbers hanging around, it might not be soo bad...
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drewprops
Bastard
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Atlanta
 
2009-05-03, 23:38

Could you ladies work out a polished, attractive-to-girls explanation for me to use when describing How Drew Works? That would be swell.


...
  quote
Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2009-05-04, 00:02

Ooh... A short essay contest... How fun!!!

How about something like... "I should tell you, I am a bit of a neat freak and the ultimate gentleman, so in an endeavor to keep things as fresh and pleasant for you as possible, I have had a personal self-cleaning system installed that absorbs the mess before it escapes! This should add much flexibility to the spontaneity of our personal time together, as a hot shower or 3 hour soak is not required to feel refreshed and rejuvenated! Oh, and we'll save about 3 loads of laundry a week, as a towel is not required! Don't worry about all the trouble I went to Babe... You're worth it!!!




  quote
Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2009-05-04, 00:07

Or short and sweet: "I promise... I will never ask you to swallow!!!"
  quote
crazychester
Dick in the Abstentia, The
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2009-05-04, 00:55

Quote:
Originally Posted by drewprops View Post
Could you ladies work out a polished, attractive-to-girls explanation for me to use when describing How Drew Works? That would be swell.


...
Ooooh yeah, I'd already been thinking about it. It'll be fun. How creative can we be? Different stories for different situations (like the one-night-stand vs. the ones you might be serious about). I was thinking along similar lines to Freewell. It's gotta all be for our benefit. But I was thinking that you'd trained yourself to do it by sheer mind control. Add a bit of Zen master touch to the whole thing.
  quote
AWR
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: State of Flux
 
2009-05-04, 02:06

Quote:
Originally Posted by drewprops View Post
A better way of showing solidarity is to begin having your prostate exam in your mid/late 30's or early 40s at the very latest.
...
In solidarity, your first post spurned me into action on this front a month or so ago, being in the latter category above.

Both the "physical" and blood results came back fine, which is a nice relief (I'm a bit of a hypochondriac, so I just moved on to worry about something else). I must say I was very disappointed with the anti-pleasure of the physical exam. You see all of these gizmos and propaganda in the adult toys world related to prostate excitement, etc ... although I confess I've never been abused as such. Butt hell, I was a writhing pig on a spit. Jesus.

Last edited by AWR : 2009-05-04 at 06:04.
  quote
zippy
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Unknown
 
2009-05-04, 06:03

In about 4 hours, I'll be providing my GI with a little peep-show into the labyrinth that is my colon. It ain't my pee-hole, but it's a tube in a tube, so it counts.

I will dedicate this one to you Drew. Solidarity!

Everyone else, PUT-UP!!!

Do you know where children get all of their energy? - They suck it right out of their parents!
  quote
RowdyScot
Ice Arrow Sniper
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: Great Bay Temple
Send a message via AIM to RowdyScot Send a message via Skype™ to RowdyScot 
2009-05-04, 09:12

I get nerves removed from my foot Friday. Does that count?
  quote
Capella
Dark Cat of the Sith
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: Rochester, NY
Send a message via AIM to Capella  
2009-05-04, 09:18

I had an endoscopy. Does this count me in for solidarity at all?
  quote
crazychester
Dick in the Abstentia, The
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2009-05-04, 10:39

Quote:
Originally Posted by zippy View Post
In about 4 hours, I'll be providing my GI with a little peep-show into the labyrinth that is my colon. It ain't my pee-hole, but it's a tube in a tube, so it counts.

I will dedicate this one to you Drew. Solidarity!

Everyone else, PUT-UP!!!
I've been at one being done on somebody else!

Probably best I don't say any more. It's interesting to watch though.
  quote
thegelding
feeling my oats
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: there are nice people here...that makes me happy
Send a message via AIM to thegelding  
2009-05-04, 13:00

i had a proctoscope at age 10...it is the reason i will never go to prison...you get a 10 inch metal tube shoved up your arse at 10 and one of two things happen...either you just embrace it or you decide at that point and time that you would rather die than be a prison bitch

g



crazy is not a rare human condition

everything is food if you chew hard enough
  quote
zsummers
Avast!
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: New York?
 
2009-05-04, 13:55

^ Finally, something scarier than Brad's evil spider.
  quote
Mugge
Thunderbolt, fuck yeah!
 
Join Date: Jan 2005
Location: Denmark
 
2009-05-04, 15:22

That thing at the top of the picture looks like a poop scoop.

They'll never take me alive!
  quote
drewprops
Bastard
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Atlanta
 
2009-05-04, 15:52

Oh geez, G!!!

And I'm liking what I'm getting from the ladies... good stuff.

...
  quote
crazychester
Dick in the Abstentia, The
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2009-05-04, 18:08

Yeah I'm a little surprised at you g bringing out the pictures of surgical instruments. That's why I kept my mouth shut about watching one.

Although I have to say it was the rather inelegant body position they put the patient into that sticks in my mind.
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Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2009-05-04, 23:48

Here's another angle Drew...

"So that you can relax and enjoy yourself completely, I have taken full responsibility for birth control. This way, you never have to worry about an unplanned occurrence in the baby department! You will never have to take pills, get shots, wear patches, or install gear... I have taken it upon myself, and have it all covered! Oh... and should we ever decide to have a family... Well, that won't be a problem either!!"
  quote
Freewell
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
 
2009-05-04, 23:49

See... I told you it wasn't all bad!!!
  quote
Partial
Stallion
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Milwaukee
 
2009-05-04, 23:52

Drew,

Wish you the best of luck in your recovery. Attitude is a huge factor in recovery, so please stay positive and strong and KNOW you're going to beat this.

You'll be in my thoughts this evening.

Dan

...and calling/e-mailing/texting ex-girlfriends on the off-chance they'll invite you over for some "old time's sake" no-strings couch gymnastics...
  quote
zsummers
Avast!
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: New York?
 
2009-05-05, 02:36

Quote:
Originally Posted by Freewell View Post
Here's another angle Drew...

"So that you can relax and enjoy yourself completely, I have taken full responsibility for birth control. This way, you never have to worry about an unplanned occurrence in the baby department! You will never have to take pills, get shots, wear patches, or install gear... I have taken it upon myself, and have it all covered! Oh... and should we ever decide to have a family... Well, that won't be a problem either!!"
Either that, or you can just say, "Hey, do you like magic? You'll never believe what I can make disappear."
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