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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-03-14, 09:20

So I was sitting there, staring at the blank slate that is my signature field, and couldn't come up with anything. Usually when that happens people will enter some milk-toast thing like "temporarily unsigned". Can't do that anymore. Useless signatures are those!

I came up with an idea: other people can vie to produce my signature. Sure I may get a total of 4 contestants (because it's just a signature), but then again I may get 40. Winning signature will be posted Friday, and stay up there for a week, at which time the next winning entrant is chosen. That's right; I officially give up on writing my own signatures until further notice or inspiration strikes me. Could be a week, could be six months.

Contest Rules:

0.5 If I have to use more than 2 lines, you're out.

1. Signature Entries cannot pertain to other forum members (ex: "I think (insert member name here) is a shameless douche bag" OR
"(insert member name here) has bodacious boobies"... well... unless you can produce visuals I can link to.

2. Signature Entries *can* describe or zing me in a clever way, as long as it's not filthy like Murbot. If it makes me laugh, there's a chance I'll post it. If it pisses me off, not only won't I post it but you may be pwned in the due course of threadmanship. You must not take lightly your responsibility in this matter. If I was writing your signature I'd be all about the quality, see?

3. Crude is out. If you would be afraid to say it to a hot date, don't submit it. If you wouldn't be afraid to say it to a hot date, and you've got a picture of her, please post it.

4. Politics is out.

5. Entries that concisely pwn big-name whores in the media or corporate world, will get an extra look. I'm all about keepin' it real.

6. Signature Entries *can* pertain to you, but if it's not funny, it's not winning. Example of something that is not funny: "(insert member name here) is going to pwn all you nOOBs."

7. Extra points for creativity and style.


Let it begin, then..... *waits..... crickets chirping in the distance.... listens to CPU fans....*

...into the light of a dark black night.
  quote
Fahrenheit
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
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2007-03-14, 09:33

this weeks entry:

"The Safest Computers are those that are not connected to the Internet. Thats why I use AOL."
  quote
Mac+
9" monochrome
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: 🇦🇺
 
2007-03-14, 09:42

Where are my new episodes of Frisky Dingo?
  quote
Fahrenheit
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
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2007-03-14, 09:44

"Missing: 1 copy of Brokeback Mountain, Used"
  quote
dmegatool
Custom User Title
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: At home
 
2007-03-14, 09:57

There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home. [1977] Ken Olson

or

I'm not dumb enough to be a goalie. - Brett Hull

Last edited by dmegatool : 2007-03-14 at 09:59. Reason: Posts merged
  quote
Schnauzer
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Arizona
 
2007-03-14, 10:00

"Were all goona die, but i got a helmet!"
  quote
BuonRotto
Not sayin', just sayin'
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Durham, NC
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2007-03-14, 10:11

"snork with a dork"
  quote
spotcatbug
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Clayton, NC
 
2007-03-14, 10:52

"I found this signature on the Internet!"
  quote
dmegatool
Custom User Title
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: At home
 
2007-03-14, 10:55

What's an internet? "
  quote
PB PM
Sneaky Punk
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Vancouver, BC
Send a message via Skype™ to PB PM 
2007-03-14, 10:57

If it is on the internet it must be true!
  quote
Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-03-14, 11:02

Some excellent entries... this is going to be tougher than I thought.

Hey Snot-boy: bite me!
  quote
chucker
‽
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: near Bremen, Germany
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2007-03-14, 11:03

"The Macintosh uses an experimental pointing device called a mouse. There is no evidence that people want to use these things." ~ John C. Dvorak
  quote
intlplby
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2004
 
2007-03-14, 11:08

"Which religion do you kill for?"
  quote
BuonRotto
Not sayin', just sayin'
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Durham, NC
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2007-03-14, 11:15

Q: What would you do for a Klondike bar?
A: Rape a hippopotamus
  quote
Banana
is the next Chiquita
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
 
2007-03-14, 11:20

If you think you've seen bad porn, you haven't seen Mr. Lay getting laid with Enron.
  quote
murbot
Hoonigan
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Canada
 
2007-03-14, 11:34

My wife can't wrestle, but you should see her box!
  quote
Fahrenheit
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
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2007-03-14, 11:37

Quote:
Originally Posted by murbot View Post
My wife can't wrestle, but you should see her box!
  quote
709
¡Damned!
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Purgatory
 
2007-03-14, 11:51

I am post merging's bitch.
  quote
Fahrenheit
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
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2007-03-14, 11:52

If you can read me, I have drivelled on for more than 30 fucking words.
  quote
InactionMan
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2007-03-14, 12:37

I just evacuated my bowels!!!


You can then link it to a current news story you find appalling or infuriating or really, really, really exciting.
  quote
Dorian Gray
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Paris, France
 
2007-03-14, 13:11

Moogs plc: Out-witting The Dirty Digger since 2004.

  quote
Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-03-14, 23:52

Damn, you guys rock.

Leave it to Murbot to make reference to my wife's box since he can't make reference to Carol's (forum member).

Rotto: sick but I laughed pretty hard on that one.

709: touche (bastard).

This will be a real challenge to pick one with another 24 hours worth of suggestions. Then again, I can create a queue...

...into the light of a dark black night.
  quote
Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2007-03-15, 21:33

And the round 1 winner is....


I can't help it... friggin Murbot and his perversions...
  quote
murbot
Hoonigan
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Canada
 
2007-03-15, 22:20

you can't make bukkake without U and KAKE
  quote
alcimedes
I shot the sherrif.
 
Join Date: May 2004
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2007-03-15, 22:29

The Smart Car: Gives you ripped abs in seconds!
  quote
Windowsrookie
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Minnesota
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2007-03-15, 22:33

"I can post anything better than you can."
  quote
Banana
is the next Chiquita
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
 
2007-03-15, 22:56

Contemplating the politics of Bush is like having your family dog humping your leg.
  quote
Schnauzer
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Arizona
 
2007-03-16, 09:46

  quote
Wyatt
Veteran Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: Near Indianapolis
 
2007-03-16, 09:47

Quote:
Originally Posted by alcimedes View Post
The Smart Car: Gives you ripped abs in seconds!
Mean, just mean.
  quote
psmith2.0
Mr. Vieira
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Tennessee
 
2007-03-16, 09:53

"Beware March 16"
  quote
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