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Imperial Ass-Whooping


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Imperial Ass-Whooping
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drewprops
Space Pirate
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Atlanta
 
2006-08-31, 17:27

So I'm going to get my ass kicked on Saturday, I already know it.

See, every year I like going to a big sci-fi/fantasy convention in Atlanta called DragonCon. I've been going to sci-fi conventions since high school, even though I'm not really a die-hard fan of anything in particular. I even wrote a screenplay that's bumping around trying to get made.... so LAST year I got a friend of mine to go with me to the food court and scrounge up some boxes and we built cardboard robot costumes from that shit. It was awesome.... so awesome that people wanted to do it again so THIS year I suggested that we make cardboard robot STORMTROOPER costumes.

We had a costume-making session last night, here's mine:



The "real" Stormtrooper guys are going to KILL us.

Any advice?

Steve Jobs ate my cat's watermelon.
Captain Drew on Twitter
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murbot
Hoonigan
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Canada
 
2006-08-31, 17:30

Go drunk and wear brass knuckles.
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macleod
Now in lower-case™!
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
 
2006-08-31, 17:35

Take a video camera too (if one is allowed) so you can YouTube the video of you getting your ass kicked while drunk and covered with boxes!
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hiltond
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Tampa Bay and CNJ
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2006-08-31, 17:38

If you get your ass kicked at least you'll look good going down. Good luck Cap'n Drew.
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Ghost2
Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
 
2006-08-31, 17:41

Just pray they don't set you on fire, hey if I was there I would.
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psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2006-08-31, 17:49

I think it's funny as hell.

To really tweak the crowd there, you or your buddy should make a Boba Fett one...those costumes seem to be the ones people get really nuts and obsessive over!

"So, I spent, like, six years on the jet-pack alone, just getting the right angles, and...".

Eh, you see one virgin in a $3,500 homemade, accurate-to-the-millimeter "Star Wars" costume, you've seen them all. But it's not every day you see a one done so well out of cardboard. That should be a treat to others in attendance!

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Robo
Formerly Roboman, still
awesome
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Portland, OR
 
2006-08-31, 18:08



Dragon Con. Oh man. That's the worst of all nerd conventions, I swear.

Yeah, I'd go too.

As for costumes...Idunno. I'd like to think I'd never dress up as a fictitious character, but Final Fantasy XII comes out on Halloween. I mean, I have to dress up for that.

But at least anyone who sees me will just assume I'm wearing a really obscure Halloween costume.

and i guess i've known it all along / the truth is, you have to be soft to be strong
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Kickaha
Likes his boobies blue.
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Hell
 
2006-08-31, 18:09

My wife's comment: "He is so going to get recycled."

Classic, man. Thumbs all around. Give the ubergeeks hell for me.
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Wrao
Yarp
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Road Warrior
 
2006-08-31, 18:10

Not bad, how many guys you have in your legion? If you want to go a little further you can pick up some plastic corrugated piping and put it in-between the joints of the armor. Otherwise just wear a black turtleneck. I saw some pretty good replica imperial rifles at the toy store today, like $15, that'd help too.

Also, you forgot the utility belt, that's one of the distinctive features of the uniform, that will help people 'get it'
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alcimedes
I shot the sherrif.
 
Join Date: May 2004
Send a message via ICQ to alcimedes  
2006-08-31, 18:12

I don't think it's possible to get an ass whooping at a comic con.

Although you might receive a horrid verbal thrashing.
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curiousuburb
Antimatter Man
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: that interweb thing
 
2006-08-31, 18:16

These aren't the boxes you're looking for...
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Wrao
Yarp
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Road Warrior
 
2006-08-31, 18:16

Now, this begs the question, does anyone know of anyone that has dressed up for say a gun/knife convention?
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709
¡Damned!
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Purgatory
 
2006-08-31, 18:25

Hmm. I'd never even heard of this DragonCon thingy, so I poked around the site a bit....and if the Stormtroopers are indeed like this I think I'd like it:


So it goes.
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Kickaha
Likes his boobies blue.
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Hell
 
2006-08-31, 18:30

Now you guys just need to wander around asking "Which way to the trash compactor?"

Oh, and the Stormboobers... not bad. Does this mean that they can't hit anything for *two* reasons?

My other brain is hung like a horse too.
#IRC isn't old school.
Old school is being able to say 'finger me' with a straight face.
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Banana
is the next Chiquita
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
 
2006-08-31, 18:49

If the Stormboobers are actually genuine Star Wars fan.... color me shocked.

I can't help but think they were paid to be there and would have no idea who is Darth Vader, let alone Bobb Fett.
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Kickaha
Likes his boobies blue.
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Hell
 
2006-08-31, 18:51

But does anyone really *CARE* if they are or not? Nooooooooo sireebob.

Besides, those are tame for skinnage at DragonCon. Plenty of such prancing around, nobody paying them squat to be there.

My other brain is hung like a horse too.
#IRC isn't old school.
Old school is being able to say 'finger me' with a straight face.
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psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2006-08-31, 18:52

Quote:
Originally Posted by Banana View Post
If the Stormboobers are actually genuine Star Wars fan.... color me shocked.

I can't help but think they were paid to be there and would have no idea who is Darth Vader, let alone Bobb Fett.
Bobb Fett? You don't him either, sumbitch.

Those girls are slightly hot, in a "I can't believe they're really here at this thing!" kinda way. Me likes the flat brown tummy...
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World Leader Pretend
Ruling teh World
 
Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: Boston, MA
 
2006-08-31, 19:55

You guys are such nerds...









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BuonRotto
Not sayin', just sayin'
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Durham, NC
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2006-08-31, 20:46

a. how much of a weakling do you have to be to fear nerds in stormtrooper outfits? Hell, you could show them the box corners and they would likely cower and their noses will bleed on cue.

b. those stormboober outfits are hiding the truth methinks. There's no reason why those hard plastic tops have to be accurately sized.

c. your outfit is frikking hilarious. Go with it!
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Brad
Selfish Heathen
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Zone of Pain
 
2006-08-31, 21:08

Love the outfit, Drew.

You never cease to amaze.
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billybobsky
BANNED
I am worthless beyond hope.
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Inner Swabia. If you have to ask twice, don't.
 
2006-08-31, 22:06

So... I was walking up Pine street in west philly and there were three people (well, two, the woman looked at me like I was her only means out...) talking about LOR and Star Wars themed Dungeons and Dragons.

You have nothing to fear, Drew.
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drewprops
Space Pirate
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Atlanta
 
2006-09-01, 00:33

Well I picked up my badge today and hit the Trader Vic's in the basement of the downtown Hilton... a few trooper walking around, one wookie, a lot of hefty girls wearing thongs... a mere dribble compared to what will be unleashed over the course of the weekend.... tempted to wear the trooper costume early but will wait until Saturday.

Note: the girl in the trooper garb who has the bellybutton jewelry is known as SithVixen, she's actually very nice and attended my PiratePalooza last year. She's just a little nerd costume girl who happened to grow up in all the right places (into a HOTTIE).... Google her for more.

It only gets better from here.....

Oh Banana, she's a HUGE Star Wars geek!

Steve Jobs ate my cat's watermelon.
Captain Drew on Twitter
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drewprops
Space Pirate
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Atlanta
 
2006-09-01, 09:40

Hey, does anybody know how to make an "echo microphone" with a rubber band and a can? I have a toy that uses a stretched spring, a rubber band, some sort of plastic thing that acts like a diaphragm. When you talk into it, the thing makes your voice sound loud and booming. I'd like to get the guys to build some of those if they have time....

Steve Jobs ate my cat's watermelon.
Captain Drew on Twitter
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psmith2.0
Mr. Farmiga
 
Join Date: May 2004
 
2006-09-01, 09:43

I'm not sure (instructions probably online somewhere), but I just enjoyed SithVixen's site to pieces.



I think someone should make a Soultrooper costume. Platform shoes, huge 8" afro coming out of the helmet, big collar, pimp cane. Kinda 70's era vibe.

"These ain't da bitches we lookin' fo'."

I saw pics of someone who'd done a rasta/Marley type of Stormtrooper costume, so I guess it's not unheard of, all these variations? Saw pics of a pink and lavender one too...a "girlie" trooper?

Things like those are always better than the real stuff. At least they're funny.

Last edited by psmith2.0 : 2006-09-01 at 09:49.
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2006-09-01, 13:12

What do you mean you're going to get your ass kicked? Literally? People don't get their ass kicked at nerd conventions. I thought everyone just walks around in their costumes, plays gigantic RPG made out of actual stuff, and generally makes it clear (for most participants) how little they actually get out in life.

I think your costume rocks. It's like you're still with the spirit of the thing, and making shit out of the thing at the same time. A veritable walking contradiction. People won't know what to think of it.

PS - based on the descriptions I've been given, most chics at nerd conventions are uber-skanks. Those two, while probably not the kind of female you bring home to mom, look like they are at least two nights worth of fun. Especially together. $100 to the first nerd who can take a candid nude or partial nude of her and post it here.

...into the light of a dark black night.
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drewprops
Space Pirate
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Atlanta
 
2006-09-01, 13:21

Quote:
Originally Posted by Moogs View Post
Especially together. $100 to the first nerd who can take a candid nude or partial nude of her and post it here.
If you want partial nudity you should follow Paul's lead. There will be plenty of OVERT nudity going on at the convention... some of it good, some of it is just WRONG.

Steve Jobs ate my cat's watermelon.
Captain Drew on Twitter
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2006-09-01, 13:27

After Google Image searching the convention, I see what you mean. Although, I was more referring to hotel room pictures. Seriously though, be glad you're in Atlanta. While some of those chics are frightening, there are a few that are decent (and I only mean decent, not hot). By the description of some of the conventions around here, the best part of the convention is leaving to go to hooters (and that's not always great either). The first page of results has a pair of angel-type-constume girls that clearly are looking for adventure.

Then again





Holy shit that's funny. The best part is when people take themselves seriously. Great halloween party outfits / trio, but as soon as you step into a nerd convention all bets are off.

...into the light of a dark black night.
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curiousuburb
Antimatter Man
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: that interweb thing
 
2006-09-01, 13:45

Quote:
Originally Posted by pscates2.0
I think someone should make a Soultrooper costume. Platform shoes, huge 8" afro coming out of the helmet, big collar, pimp cane. Kinda 70's era vibe.

"These ain't da bitches we lookin' fo'."

I saw pics of someone who'd done a rasta/Marley type of Stormtrooper costume, so I guess it's not unheard of, all these variations? Saw pics of a pink and lavender one too...a "girlie" trooper?

Things like those are always better than the real stuff. At least they're funny.
How about a Gene Simmons Trooper and a Darth Pimp?



Or Darth Maul, Porn Lord?



Or DJ Trooper action figures?



Or real life versions?


See also the classic 1997 action figure animation from StarWars Breakbeats

The Suckadelic Star's Boba Fett costume swapped the jetpack for a turntable.

And I still think some of the tunes were class back in '97 (before Lucas sued him).

All those who believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.
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Moogs
Hates the Infotainment
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: NSA Archives
 
2006-09-01, 15:42

Holy shit. That's some scary pictures.
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drewprops
Space Pirate
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Atlanta
 
2006-09-03, 09:53

No ass-whoopings so far!
I'm going to write this down here then copy bits of it to my blog later on.... you guys get it first. I hope nobody minds me putting the web address on there... let me know.

Three of us suited up in the parking garage yesterday morning and headed up into the hotel. The reactions were great.... kind of a "Oh no you dih-en!", lots of grins. The girls especially loved us because we were "cute"... but I get that a lot already.

Out to the street for a 4 or 5 block hike south to the mustering point for the parade. I suggested that we take a street parallel to Peachtree to avoid too many people seeing us. It was a good shake-down hike, to see what wanted to fall off. Two guys who were working doing some clean up at a restaurant saw us as we stopped at a crosswalk and one of them yelled to the other "Hey James, is them the boxes you threw in the garbage?"

The next street down a guy whipped his car over to the curb on the other side of the street and jumped out to snap our photos. He didn't get it right the first time so he turned and ran down the sidewalk away from us then turned to get more. Nope, not right yet. He turned, ran, then crossed the street to get over where he could get us as we clumped toward him. At the next corner we turned and saw the crowd and went up to join the Star Wars people.

Upon our arrival several people approached us for photos. Then more people. Then more.

Our group:


My suit:


My friends Alfeo and Elliott had a view of the line of stormtroopers behind me and were getting antsy because the guys in the trooper uniforms looked like they were trying to decide what they thought about us. But then one of the folks walked over and put us in proper place for people who don't belong to any of the organizations (like the 501st).

The parade march was really fun. REALLY, REALLY FUN. This is a picture a friend sent me from way back in the beginning part of the parade as we got started:


The crowds got bigger and bigger as we approached the convention hotels and whenever people saw us they went nuts. I felt like an astronaut in a ticker tape parade... wearing a cardboard box and sweating my ass off. I'm totally out of shape and started feeling it by the time we got to the top of the hill, thankfully everything else was downhill from there.

Steve Jobs ate my cat's watermelon.
Captain Drew on Twitter
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